Speaking of costumes, looks like Microsoft put theirs on a little early this year. Apparently they're disguised as a standards-embracing software company. Faithful viewer Hunt Anderson points us to a quote by Microsoft group product manager Charles Fitzgerald. In a New.com article about the U.S. vote against making Java an international standard, he says, "Sun either needs to go all the way and make Java a real open standard or admit it is proprietary. They don't get to have their cake and eat it too."

Does anyone else find that as funny as we do?

Wheeee! The flames are building fast and furious over at Mac OS Rumors. You absolutely must read this week's editorial, in which the Rumors staff mix it up with Jim Carlton of the Wall Street Journal. Jim, you may recall, is also the author of the recently-released book Apple: The Inside Story of Intrigue, Egomania, and Business Blunders.

The Rumors folks paint their own story of intrigue this week. It's a tale of questionable ethics, borderline blackmail, and just plain ickiness that's begging to be made into a movie of the week starring Noah Wyle as the victimized Ryan Meader, Tim Allen as the ruthless Carlton, and Molly Ringwald as the entirely fictional and utterly obligatory "other woman."

Seriously, it sounds like Carlton is playing hardball with the Rumors staff in an effort to scoop Forbes Magazine on an interview. Rumors committed to the Forbes story first, and Carlton "hinted" that the WSJ would run a highly uncomplimentary story on Rumors unless Ryan et al spoke to Carlton first. But the Rumors staff are unstoppable (remember how they bounced back from the attacks of the Apple-funded Ninja Hit Squad?), and they've gone public with every sordid detail.

Who wrote this drama? And can we hire them?

Meanwhile, Mac OS Rumors continues to crank out the finest in Apple-related dirt, undaunted by their "interesting" situation with Carlton and the WSJ. Now two of their sources have told them that Steve Jobs is investigating the possibility of installing--get this--a helipad near Pixar, to facilitate his commute between Pixar and Apple. The proposed helipad (and a new twin-turbo helicopter) would allow Speedy Steve to zip between the two companies in 15 minutes or less. The initial lease, it is said, would be for two years. Does that seem a little long, considering Steve's voiced expectation to be back at Pixar full-time in two months?

It all sounds pretty wild, but consider this article from the Washington Post, who interviewed Oracle's Larry Ellison, Apple board member and Steve's best friend. It now seems that Steve may be considering becoming Chairman of the Board, instead of CEO. As CoB, Steve would be spending a day and a half every week at Apple. If that were the case, then a two-year commitment for a helicopter taxi service between his two companies might not be out of the question. Excessive? Heck yeah. But beyond consideration? Nope-- especially not for the likes of Steve.