Okay, folks, no BuyMusic.com-bashing today; our therapist says we're forming an unhealthy obsession with the faults of Scott Blum's online music service, and that we could grow as self-actualized beings in control of our own emotional health by saying something good about it for once. So we wracked our brains about it all night, trying really hard to come up with something positive to say, some compliment for the service just to prove to ourselves and to the world at large that we're open-minded people who aren't at all obsessed about torpedoing this particular music download business just because it happens to suc... ...CESSfully avoid being great. (Ha! Now that's a SAVE, baby! Hey shrink, are ya watching?) So we were up all night, and it kind of hurt, but we think we've finally got something good and positive to say. Ready?

It's not run by Hitler's brain.

Pretty good, right? And catchy, too. In fact, it's good enough that we've decided to offer it to Scott Blum to use as an official slogan for his service: "BuyMusic.com is not run by Hitler's brain." That ought to turn the tide of public opinion in his favor and keep him from the lynch mob for another 48 hours. So there it is: our therapy homework for the week, a nice big dose of positivity towards the iTunes Music Store's unrepentant imitator and simultaneous detractor. BuyMusic.com is not run by Hitler's brain.

At least, as far as we know.

Meanwhile, others seem to be having no trouble whatsoever coming up with good things to say about the iTMS-- even if they're just looking at numbers on a page. Take, for example, the NPD Group, a marketing research firm who has in the past educated us all with reports both insightful ("NPD Reports Increasing Awareness Of Upcoming Harry Potter Movie As Release Draws Near"-- ooooo!) and hard-hitting ("The NPD Group Reports French Fries Are the Real Losers in the Fast Food Industry"). No, seriously-- we assure you that NPD is a legitimate and well-respected marketing research firm, despite the fact that it earnestly invites people to contact them "for more information on what's really happening in the world of fries" and continues to insist that one of its vice presidents is actually named "Harry Balzer."

So NPD took a break from its FryWatch to conduct a poll of over 13,000 consumers last June, and discovered some really nifty stuff about the iTMS. It turns out that 20% of all consumers age 13 and up had heard about Apple's 99 cent-per-song download service only two months after its launch, compared to 14% who had heard about subscription-based rivals Pressplay and Rhapsody, both of which had been around for more than a year. Better yet, among Apple's target market of Mac-using consumers, the iTMS had an astounding 46% awareness rate-- and 6% have actually purchased and downloaded some music. Meanwhile, despite the fact that Pressplay and Rhapsody have been targeting the ninety-whatever percent of the computing population that uses Windows instead of Macs, "less than one percent" of all consumers reported having actually downloaded music from either service, and "future usage intent was not any higher."

Good news, right? Although the comparison of the iTMS's numbers to those of Rhapsody and Pressplay isn't nearly as exciting as it could be; perhaps we'll see a followup poll in a few months that can give us a better sense of how the iTMS is doing against a service with a very (cough) similar pricing and availability structure, like say, oh, how about BuyMusic.com? Now that should be a horse race, especially what with BuyMusic's $40 million marketing blitz. In fact, we sincerely believe that BuyMusic has a shot at being more popular than the iTMS. Provided they use our slogan, of course. And if they don't use it, well... just what does that imply about the brain behind the operation?

The Power Mac G5 already looks like a hit, despite the fact that it's not even shipping yet; reports are flooding in from all corners of the globe (well, okay, a couple of resellers sent us email) indicating that preorders for the perforated aluminum beauties are off the charts. And you can see for yourself; the dual-processor model has been on the Apple Store's Top Ten list for ages, now-- maybe as far back as the day the G5 was first announced.

There's just one teensy little problem: everybody seems to want the dual-processor 2.0 GHz model. At the Apple Store, the dual currently sits at number 7, while neither of the two single-processor systems are even in the Top 20. Anecdotal evidence suggests that the phenomenon isn't limited to the Apple Store, either; professional Mac users have Dual Fever, and for good reason. Seriously, if you'd been waiting for donkey's years for a serious leap forward in Mac performance, would you spend $1999 for the entry-level 1.6 GHz G5, or would you toss in an extra grand for two processors, each running at 2.0 GHz and with a 25% faster frontside bus, twice the RAM, twice the storage, a RADEON 9600 Pro graphics card, and PCI-X instead of PCI? Exactly. The only conceivable reason to cheap out on a purchase like this is because you just don't have another thou sitting around, and you're too chicken to pull a bank job to score the extra fundage.

Okay, so some people just can't afford the top-of-the-line model. We suppose we can see that. Maybe there's some call for the 1.6 GHz G5. But what's up with the 1.8 GHz one? Seriously, is anyone going to have an extra $400 to spring for the middle-child model that can't somehow raise $600 more for Ultimate Blasting-Guy-Through-Side-Of-House Power? Maybe it's just us, but if all we needed to score a much faster Mac was another $600, we'd find a way to get it, and we're not proud of the things we'd be willing to do for it. (Yes, even things with cooking oil.) We're just guessing, here, but we imagine that demand for the Jan Brady of the G5 lineup is pretty soft. (Which is pretty appropriate, when you think about it, since Jan was probably pretty soft, too.)

Therein lies the problem: sure, lots of people buying the costlier dual 2.0 GHz system is going to bring Apple a lot of revenue; unfortunately, 2.0 GHz chips are probably scarcer than their 1.8 GHz and 1.6 GHz brethren. Not only that, but it's a little-known but crucial fact that a dual-processor Power Mac actually uses up twice as many processors. (Really!) So Apple might run out of 2.0 GHz chips before demand is fulfilled, and then it'll be sitting on a surplus of 1.6 and 1.8 GHz PowerPCs so big company employees will start using them as poker chips in the after-hours hands of five card stud.

So what's the solution? Well, MacBidouille (amusingly cryptic but mostly understandable Google auto-translation here) claims to have info "on one of breakage head of the summer for APPLE, the delivery of G5"-- and who wouldn't want that? As near as we can make out, MacBidouille claims that the dual-G5 preorders have indeed "exceeded all the estimates" and Apple won't have enough 2.0 GHz chips to fulfill all the orders in a reasonable time frame. So sometime within the next week the company will decide whether or not to introduce a new, lower-end dual-processor model-- a 1.8 GHz one-- which may lift some of the heat off the two-giggers while also unloading some of those extra Jan Brady chips.

Reportedly, if this plan gets the go-ahead, customers with dual-2.0 GHz machines on order will be contacted if they won't be getting their gear before their grandchildren die of old age, and they'll be offered a dual-1.8 GHz model instead-- at a price break of about $450. As long as customers have the option to stick it out and wait around for their original 2.0 GHz order at its original price, it sounds like an okay compromise to us; it's nowhere near as lamebrained a scheme as that old G4 Speed Dump fiasco, and customers who want to save a little money without losing a whole lot of power can opt for the "New and Improved Jan Brady" (you know, after she got that wig). After all, Apple needs to do something; all the customers are screaming for "Marcia, Marcia, Marcia!"

By the way, that "cooking oil" reference-- we meant we'd take a job at the deep-fryer in a fast-food joint to make the extra dough. Why, what did you think we meant?

Say, you know how we've all been hearing rumors about a new wireless Apple keyboard and mouse for about four or five geological eras now? Well, at least the most recent round of reports had some solid foundation in verifiable fact: price drops on existing Apple typey and clicky things; Apple Store order summaries specifically listing a "Keyboard Wired" and a "Wired Mouse" as parts in Power Mac orders; and some Panther developer builds including a Bluetooth tab in the Keyboard and Mouse preferences. Put 'em all together, and forecasts call for partly sunny skies and a 70% chance of wireless input devices before the year is out.

AppleInsider's got the latest juice on this well-worn subject, and reportedly Apple is looking to shine up the new wireless gear "in time for the release of Panther." As anyone who hasn't suffered a debilitating head injury would expect, the new Pro Mouse and Pro Keyboard are said to match Apple's professional Macs with the now-requisite aluminum finish. To start, these suckers allegedly aren't going to be standard Power Mac components; to get them, you'll either need to buy them together with a Wireless Bluetooth module or specify them as a build-to-order option the next time you buy a Mac.

And why the release alongside Panther? Why, because Panther reportedly has spiffy Bluetooth input support baked right in, complete with "onscreen notification of wireless keyboard and mouse connectivity and disconnectivity." Terrific. That means that someday we'll have another fun game to distract us, namely, "Let's see how much aluminum foil we need to wrap the mouse in before the 'Mouse Disconnected' image pops up." (This is a variant of the old "Let's see which body part placed between the PowerBook and the AirPort Base Station can make the signal meter drop by the most notches.")

Aside from their snazzy aluminum finish and their built-in potential for hours of signal-blocking fun, you may be asking just what the big deal is about having wireless input devices. Ah-- spoken like a person who's never used one! The primary benefit of using wireless keyboards and mice is that it's far easier to hurl them in rage at walls, out windows, or at passersby, because you needn't unplug them first-- which, as you're no doubt aware, tends to break one's stride a little. So wait just a little longer, folks, and Apple will sell you some aerodynamic and built-to-hurl chunks of metal lovingly crafted as the ultimate in convenience missiles for those with anger management problems. (Why do you think they use aircraft aluminum?)