There's at least one nice thing about Mac OS X Tiger being at least five months away: we're not so frenzied with 10.4 Madness yet that we can't still appreciate the simple joys of a 10.3.x update. And it's a good thing, too, because as faithful viewer Jason Terhorst was first to report, the Mac OS X Update 10.3.5 is now ready and waiting in your Software Update panel, just itching to deliver 43 MB worth of that "enhanced functionality and improved reliability" you've all come to crave. New video drivers, better networking, improved Bluetooth compatibility, enhanced FireWire and USB support, new versions of Mail and Image Capture, better font management, even better compatibility with third-party apps; why, the list goes on and on.

Actually, the list kinda stops right there-- well, except for Apple having tossed in all the Security Updates since 10.3.4, which is always a helpful move. In any event, though, that's a decent heap of improvements for us all to chew on while Tiger gets hammered into shape by Apple's resident code-jockeys. We look forward to installing it once we've carefully read the early reports and scanned for any "issues" with which the updater or new system components might choose to surprise us. It's just common sense, really, especially with Apple's recent history of posting software with "surprises" inside. The memory of the original Mac OS X 10.2.8 Update ("Network? Yeah, I gotcher network right here, pally") still haunts us, and we still don't know why Apple pulled that iPhoto 4.0.2 updater. Considering that 10.3.4 is running just fine for us right now, we can stand the wait.

Jason, on the other hand, was plucky enough to take the plunge and install that sucker right away, instead of spending the prudent day or so waiting to hear from those impetuous little "early adopter" scamps who just dive headfirst into this stuff without ever stopping to consider the potential consequences (people like, er, well, Jason), and he reports that "so far, it works great!" So on the off-chance that the 10.3.5 updater does contain a nasty bug, you can rest easy in the knowledge that it hasn't affected Jason. At least we've all got that going for us.

Once 10.3.5 turns out to be a benign and beneficial little update (as we're certain it will), we look forward to installing it and being numerically halfway from Panther to Tiger. Because while the next major upgrade to Mac OS X isn't yet preying on our thoughts every waking moment (which, with us, is just about all of them), we are occasionally breaking out in a cold sweat at the thought of not getting to mess with Spotlight or Dashboard for up to another ten or eleven months. So the closer Apple can get us to Tiger (even in a purely numerical sense) in the meantime ought to help stave off the shakes.

Incidentally, if any of you are still cowering in the cellar with a baseball bat because you're paranoid about evil PNGs coming to get you, you'll be relieved to hear that, in Apple's detailed list of changes under "other enhancements," Apple notes that 10.3.5 "updates the libpng (Portable Network Graphics) component." It doesn't happen to mention how, but we figure it's a pretty safe bet that it fixes that whole buffer overflow problem and you can put away the sports equipment and come back above ground, now.

Don't get us wrong, here: we're immensely grateful to The Powers That Be that Steve Jobs's cancer and surgery weren't more serious. Still, we have to admit, we're more than a little bummed about the timing; now that Steve's convalescence has more or less put him out of action for a month, we suppose we can just plumb forget about him winning the November election. Losing an entire month's worth of campaigning and baby-kissing a mere twelve weeks before the polls open is probably one of the most catastrophic things that can happen to a presidential campaign. Granted, it's arguably less calamitous to Steve's chances of winning than the fact that he's not actually running for office or that he doesn't want the job in the first place, but in our eyes, this whole "month off" thing really clinches it.

Of course, if Steve's just looking to get his tendrils into the federal government, then he might consider finding another position that's a little better suited to his unique abilities. When you hear about the state of the country's various intelligence agencies (lots of work happening all over the place, but massive communication failures preventing anything from coming together into worthwhile results), are you reminded of Apple in the mid-nineties? Because we just can't shake the image of all those pre-Amelio Apple employees doing whatever they thought they should be working on, while no one had an eye on the details or the big picture-- until Steve showed up, of course.

So the way he turned Apple into a focused and effective company again might just land him a gig in Washington. Faithful viewer gbois pointed out an NPR segment in which a reporter eventually recommends that Steve by whisked away to Washington to fix the nation's allegedly broken security network; at the end of a four-and-a-half-minute segment examining possible solutions to the "information sharing" problem which prevents critical information from getting into the hands of the people who need it most, Larry Abramson has this to say: "So, members of Congress might want to look outside Washington for a real visionary. They might ask, say, Apple's Steve Jobs to spend some time as National Intelligence Director. He knows something about shaking up an organization and bringing it back from the brink of collapse."

Granted, this is just an off-the-cuff remark by a radio correspondent and not an invitation from the White House, but aside from that, what do you think? We have a feeling that Steve could do far more to advance his secret plans for world domination in a sneaky, under-the-radar National Intelligence Director role than he could as Commander-in-Chief, which attracts a little too much attention. Indeed, we're starting to wonder if Larry Abramson's comment was an off-the-cuff remark, and not a Reality Distortion Field-induced rogue thought planted by Steve himself, just to get the prez and Congress thinking "hmmmmmmmm."

Think of it: Steve as Intelligence Czar, "overseeing and coordinating the 'foreign and domestic activities of the intelligence community.'" Why, he'd be wearing the high-cowled cape of Supreme Overlord of Earth inside of two years. What could be better?

And in the "Hey, honey, I just mortgaged our house and spent our life savings and the kids' college funds to open a Haggis on a Stick™ franchise down at the mall food court" department, did you ever think you'd see a business move as gutsy or as ill-conceived as what Roxio just pulled? Roxio, as you're probably aware, is the company that sells a bunch of popular Mac and Windows disc-mastering and -burning products-- like the practically indispensable Toast, which can make your drive jump through hoops you didn't even know existed. Well, a couple of years ago, the company decided to diversify-- by purchasing the tattered, smoldering remains of what once had been Napster (before the courts ran it backwards through a wood chipper after setting it on fire).

So now Roxio is desperately trying to turn a profit by renting and selling music through a legit pay-to-listen service wearing a Napster t-shirt, a cat mask, and a name tag that says "Hello, My Name Is RAMPANT CORPORATE MARKETING MACHINE HOPING TO CASH IN ON YOUTH CULTURE'S LOVE OF THE OUTLAW IMAGE." The thing is, the plan hasn't been going all that well; Napster has yet to turn a profit (though it is narrowing its losses) and we get the distinct impression that Roxio is bleeding capital in arcing, arterial spurts as it tries to bring the service to critical mass. Remember the "Hey, we're losing money, so let's give away free hardware" plan? And Napster may be signing up a ton of paranoid universities who hope to keep their students from turning their campus networks into dedicated KaZaA transport mechanisms, but the company itself admits that it cuts the schools such a huge price break that any profit from those deals is "immaterial."

Now, in such a situation, wouldn't you expect Roxio to be thinking, "gee, this Napster thing isn't working out quite how we'd planned-- thank heaven we have our main business of selling media creation software to fall back on"? Well, as it turns out, Roxio is planning to jettison half of its decidedly schizo business; we're just wondering whether the right half got the heave-ho, because faithful viewer dev dished up a CNET article which reports that the company "will sell its consumer software division for $80 million and focus wholly on its Napster digital music business." Indeed, once the sale is complete, Roxio will even be renamed Napster. Which has us wondering: is it just us, or if you had to put all your eggs in one basket, would that be the basket you'd choose?

Still, you have to respect a company that follows a dream, even if said dream leads it plunging straight into a big, bubbly vat of Tabasco sauce 'n' battery acid. Once it sells its non-Napster assets to Sonic Solutions (oh, for cryin' out Pete's sake, Toast is moving again? From Astarte to Adaptec to Roxio to Sonic-- that poor app's been smacked around like a hockey puck), Napster will reportedly have about $130 million in cash to burn through as it tries to eke out a profit alongside the iTunes Music Store. Right now it's betting that lots more people won't mind renting their music, as long as they can listen to it on a portable player; Microsoft's taking care of the tech, and we assume that Napster's $130 mil will be spent on the media blitz to end all media blitzes. (Blitzen?)

Pssst-- hey, Napster! Why not hire ex-Mötley Crüe drummer and convicted spouse-abuser Tommy Lee as a spokesperson and plaster his naked body all over Times Square? It worked great for BuyMusic.com, didn't it?