Okay, so Artemis finally got here and it's not the $1000 wonder many of us expected it to be. For those of you who still wonder about whether Apple is ever going to address the needs of the sub-$1000 computer market, you may be interested to know that Mac the Knife is discussing some very intriguing possibilities in the upcoming Mac lineup. If he's right, the all-in-one Mac unveiled scant days ago will only be available for a couple of quarters, after which it'll be replaced by a completely different set of low-cost Macs.

Now, it's unclear whether those new low-cost Artemis-replacing Macs are the same as the sub-$1000 models that the Knife reports as slotted for arrival this summer. Those particular ultra-cheap Macs will be based on the hitherto-abandoned Santa Fe design, which was originally expected to be used in the eMate line. (Given that the eMate as we know it is now history, it's nice to hear that not all of the development done for it is going to waste.) There are two rumored configurations of this low-cost wonder: one is a network computer version, with fast Ethernet and no hard drive, but with the ability to boot from a network server; and the other is a home version, with a hard drive for local storage, a 56K modem, and the option for a DVD player. Both configurations will sport a color LCD display. Oh, and did we mention that the code name for this project is "Columbus?" We're more convinced now than ever that the Columbus project encompasses many low-cost products, including NC's, set-top boxes, eMate-style portables, and more.

Incidentally, the Knife also mentions that insiders are predicting a Q2 Apple profit of $80 to $100 million-- even higher than predicted by Mac OS Rumors' source. Blimey! Keep all this in mind, as we plan to launch our quarterly "Beat the Analysts" contest before the week is out. If your guess is the closest to Apple's actual posted results, you'll win an as-yet-unspecified fabulous prize from our Baffling Vault of Antiquity!™

We certainly hope that Apple's preparing to enter the sub-$1000 market before they miss the boat entirely, but it seems the competition in that arena is about to get even nastier. Cyrix, a producer of x86/Intel-compatible chips for low-cost PC's, plans to announce tomorrow that they are working on a new processor destined for sub-$500 computers. Details can be found at News.com.

Now, we assume that a sub-$500 machine doesn't include a display, but that's still a really, really low price for a computer. In order to build a chip for a system that cheap that can still bring in a profit, Cyrix is building pretty much the whole PC onto its new chip. Not only will it be the central processing unit, but it will also include video and other functions necessary for a basic PC all soldered onto the same piece of silicon. That means the motherboard for such a system basically only needs this new chip, some RAM, and a cheap hard disk. It's the ultimate in non-modular and non-upgradeable design, but it's incredibly cheap; after all, if a system only costs $499, it's essentially disposable.

The new chip is due next year, and is expected to be used in set-top boxes and sub-$1000 laptop computers as well as sub-$500 desktop machines. As for whether or not Apple could possibly compete in an arena that requires them to keep costs so low but still deliver a machine of Apple quality, we're not betting either way; Apple just hasn't been able to produce low-cost home systems in the past, but the "New Apple" continues to surprise us constantly. We're adopting a "wait and see" attitude.

The following is not directly relevant to anything we're usually dealing with. In fact, it's not even indirectly relevant, really, but it's just too apt for our show to ignore. It appears that Paul Allen, Bill Gates' co-founder of Microsoft, is being sued for sexual harrassment by a woman who claims she was fired after she rebuffed his advances. There's more on this sordid affair available in a San Jose Mercury News article.

Abbie Phillips, a manager at Storyopolis Investment (a media company financially backed by Allen), charges that she was invited to Allen's Seattle home after a business meeting. Once there, she claims he harrassed her by "physically coercing her down and fondling her breasts." She "politely and appropriately rejected his intentions" even after he crawled into bed with her and "tried to have sex," after which she found herself fired from her job. For the record, Allen "strongly denies" all of this, and states that Ms. Phillips was in fact fired for embezzlement. Phillips' attorney counters that the charges of misappropriation of funds are "completely absurd" and were not made until after the harassment suit was filed. Sounds like a big ol' mess, hmmm?

The only way that this relates to AtAT's usual sphere is by Mr. Allen's connection to Microsoft. But let's face it-- we've yet to see a nice, juicy sexual harassment case, major embezzlement, or murder come out of Cupertino. Until that happens, AtAT will readily leap upon any such alleged impropriety involving anyone who can be associated in any way with the AtAT plot. I mean hey, what are we here for, anyway?