You know how on slow news days your local news forecast likes to fall back on fluff? You know, stuff like human interest stories about a pet ferret who can tie itself in a knot, or "news" like how studies show that eating too much might lead to weight gain. (Gasp!) Well, since AtAT relies on actual events for its steady stream of Apple-related plot twists and drama, we're no different. And since this has been a maddeningly slow week in the realm of One Infinite Loop (curse that dastardly Steve and his leak-plugging antics!), if this were an actual rumors show, we wouldn't bother to broadcast at all. If this were a "legitimate" news show, we'd probably be telling you about a gazillion shareware updates to enrich your Mac-using experience. But this is a soap opera, and as such, we're mining drama from one of the old standbys: awards shows.

Yes, awards shows. From Sally Field's 1985 "You like me, you really like me!" Oscar speech to the Daytime Emmy thrill of Susan Lucci's final triumph, where better to turn when the drama well's run dry? After all, the average viewer would probably rather watch the Oscars instead of the news any day of the week. (Of course, the average viewer would also rather watch "Surprise Wedding" than "Masterpiece Theatre"-- sorry, "ExxonMobil Masterpiece Theatre"-- but that's beside the point.) And so it is with moist eyes and a song in our hearts that we bring you news of Apple's latest honor: according to MacCentral, the Power Mac G4 Cube has been blessed with a Popular Mechanics Design & Engineering Award. And the crowd goes wild!

The Cube, which has garnered critical acclaim even as it flopped at the box office, is being recognized for its exquisite "innovation, invention, design, and engineering." Even better, it's the only computer to be so honored this year. Hopefully, when the award results are published in Popular Mechanics's December issue, all those tight-walleted skinflints in the Cube's target market (which is, uh... yeah) will be moved by the photos of a tearful Cube clutching its hard-won award as it overruns the allotted time for its acceptance speech. If so, then maybe the Cube's box office draw will improve just in time for the holidays-- provided that Apple's makeup people were able to conceal any mold lines, that is. Congrats to the Cube, and here's to next year!

The Cube's not the only Appleite to win an award recently. Sure, it's great when the stars win their accolades, because it keeps the whole show in the public eye and really tugs at the heartstrings. But what of the unsung heroes behind the scenes? What about all those tireless techs who worked so hard to make the production a success? The average shmoe may overlook the "Best Sound Editing" award when there's a close race for "Best Actor," but nevertheless, the technical awards are an important way to honor the nameless, faceless folks who scramble like mad to make sure the stars get their chance to shine.

That's why we're proud to announce that Apple Computer has just won ZDNet's Support Star Award, which serves to recognize outstanding achievement in the fields of customer satisfaction and technical support. What's even more gratifying is that this is a "User's Choice" award, which means that the winner is chosen by actual customers who use the company's products and services-- so you know it means something real, since it comes from the trenches. In addition to finding Apple's support web site "extremely easy" to navigate, reportedly users who needed to phone Apple for tech support spent less time on hold and wound up speaking to technicians who were both "courteous and knowledgeable." Based on those factors, most respondents agreed that they'd "recommend purchasing another Apple computer" in the future.

So, kudos to Apple's support staff! Sometimes it's easy to forget that while Apple's tech support policies have declined somewhat over the years, the company's technical support engineers are still head and shoulders above the rest. Or, at least, most of the rest; as any longtime AtAT viewer knows, wherever Apple goes, Dell follows, and this is no exception. Dell is Apple's Support Star co-winner this year, actually surpassing Apple's ranking when it comes to the "professional courtesy" of its support engineers. (Hey, that's not too surprising; we imagine fielding so many calls about "cracks" in G4 Cubes would make anyone a little cranky.) But even though Apple has to share the spotlight with Dell, that in no way diminishes the accomplishment of the brave souls manning its phones. Congratulations, people... and thanks. Now, about that crash-on-wake problem on our PowerBook...

Let's say you're a hot new high-tech company with plenty of favorable industry buzz and you're just days away from your IPO. What's the worst thing that could happen? Well, how about one of the industry's biggest and most visible giants abruptly dropping its support for your product with little or no explanation for its actions, thus leading to all kinds of speculation by the press about the effectiveness of your technology? Ooooh, yeah, that's gotta hurt. Congratulations! Now you know how the folks at Transmeta might be feeling right about now.

Transmeta, you've probably heard, has this new chip called "Crusoe," which is a low-power processor that's designed for use in laptop computers. Because of its extremely low power draw, the hype was that Crusoe-powered laptops might be able to eke out ten hours or more of productive work on a single battery charge-- heck, when we recently heard about Sony's new Crusoe-based VAIO laptops, we were hearing that they'd manage seventeen hours of juice between rechargings. Rumor had it that even Apple has been working on a Crusoe-based PowerBook in its secret underground bunkers in order to tap into the chip's battery-saving potential.

Unfortunately, it seems that the hype doesn't much resemble reality. CNET reports that IBM has shelved its plans for a Crusoe-powered ThinkPad 240; no reason was given, although the company claims that it's still evaluating Transmeta "on an ongoing basis." Some analysts figure that IBM bailed because of performance issues. Since the Crusoe isn't an x86-based processor (as near as we can make out), all Windows applications have to run through a "code-morphing software layer" which sounds basically like a performance-chewing Virtual PC-style emulator. But worse yet, ZDNet reports that instead of the eight-hour battery life that IBM hoped to advertise in its Crusoe-based ThinkPad, the current prototypes are only boasting-- get this-- "two and a half to three hours" of juice. This is progress? C'mon, our iBook beats that on a bad day.

So, unless the Crusoe shows some serious improvement in the future, odds are Apple isn't missing much by sticking with the PowerPC. The specter of Exponential comes to mind; remember them? They were the folks working on an alternate PowerPC processor way back when. Apple sunk some money into their efforts, but the first "x704" chips were late, hot, and not nearly as fast as originally hyped. Eventually Apple pulled its support, leading to Exponential's collapse and a lawsuit against our Cupertino protagonists, the outcome of which we still don't know. That's not to say that Transmeta's going to follow suit, but so far this story is shaping up to be vaguely familiar. It's a shame, too-- just as we had high hopes for 500 MHz PowerPCs back in 1996, the idea of a seventeen-hour PowerBook had us drooling on our keyboards.