TV-PGAugust 3, 1999: FreeMac's free iMac is cheaper than some free PCs, but it's not for everybody. Meanwhile, Apple-watching prognosticators focus their full attention on "Kihei," the next-generation iMac, and Andy Ihnatko puts the smack-down on an iBook that just smiles and asks for more...
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From the writer/creator of AtAT, a Pandemic Dad Joke taken WAYYYYYY too far

 
How Cheap is Your Free? (8/3/99)
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Okay, it's official: FreeMac has announced its plan to give away a million free iMacs to the "right kind of people." (The "right kind of people" are generally going to be people who could pay for an iMac on their own, but we'll discuss that shortly.) As faithful viewer Jerry O'Neil points out, the New York Times has a pretty solid article that analyzes the ins and outs of FreeMac's press release. Basically, it comes down to this: in terms of actual monetary payment, FreeMac's free iMacs only cost $718.20. Personally, we think that's pretty cheap for a free computer, especially considering that this is a free iMac, and not some nasty-looking box from Cheapoworkz or MicroSavr.

See, it's complete folly to think that anyone offering you a free computer isn't going to charge you for it-- or, rather, they're going to charge you for something else, and "give" you the computer for "free." Free computers always cost something, so you get into this whole question of which free computers are more expensive; FreeMac's free iMac is $718.20, but Micron's free PC is $1087, according to CNET. Confused yet? Don't be; just keep in mind that this whole trend has completely redefined the word "free," and get used to it. (Or don't, since plenty of people don't think the whole "free computer" business model can possibly succeed anyway-- take Robert Morgan and his latest RFI Report, for example.)

In FreeMac's case, the $718.20 you'd pay for your free iMac is actually paying for three mandatory years' worth of Earthlink Internet service (which is a waste if you've got an existing faster connection via ISDN, ADSL, or cable modem). But in addition to the actual money you're paying out, you'll pay for your free iMac by selling a little part of your soul; in other words, prepare for advertising. Lots of it. Two gigabytes of your iMac's hard drive will be filled with promotional materials. And from time to time, you'll be "offered discounts and services from a group of as yet unnamed marketing partners." And to make sure that they only enlist people who have money to spend on the goods and services they'll be pushing, you only qualify for a free $718.20 iMac if you also qualify for a FreeMac credit card. Now, if you're not the sort who balks at long-term contracts and can stomach the prospect of a guaranteed and steady stream of advertising, you may still find FreeMac's offer a good deal. Others, however, would probably be better off shelling out the additional $480.80 for an iMac with no strings attached...

 
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Gimme $20 on Seybold (8/3/99)
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You waited for over a year. You read rumors about wireless Internet access, sub-$1000 prices, instant-on, an eight-hour battery life, pen-based handwriting input, Mac OS Lite, and a gazillion other features that may or may not have made it into the final product in some form or another. You spent many a sleepless night trying to reconcile all the rumors and force them together into a viable, cost-effective consumer portable. And now that it's finally been announced, you (and Mac mavens everywhere) feel strangely empty; you're searching for the Next Big Thing™ from Apple to fill the gaping hole left in your speculator's soul by the arrival of the iBook. Fear not; there's still the next-generation iMac, code-named "Kihei"-- and it invites the same kind of guessing games as the iBook did: what'll it be, and when will we see it?

First of all, the "what": if you're brushing off a new iMac as boring (sacrilege!), it's important to note that Kihei isn't just a new iMac revision-- it's a whole new beast. Until now, all we've seen in terms of iMac changes are minor things like processor speed bumps, graphics improvements, disk size increases, etc. But Kihei is more than that; it's rumored to use an entirely new enclosure, possibly with a slightly bigger screen and a pull-out motherboard architecture that should make upgrading Kihei RAM a snap (as opposed to the bizarre and arcane ritual that's necessary now). There's also a lot of talk that Kihei will include FireWire and possibly a DVD-ROM drive plus DVD video hardware. NoBeige has a pretty hefty compendium of rumored Kihei specs, including an "artist's conception" of what it might look like.

Now, recently, the rumors we've been hearing most all have to do with "when." Originally some people figured on a Macworld Expo introduction, but obviously that didn't happen-- allegedly because Apple needed to enlist the help of Kihei engineers to get the iBook done in time. So now there are three "most probable" time frames for a Kihei introduction. First, there's August 15th, which is the iMac's first birthday; Mac the Knife is currently touting this as Kihei's big "hello again (again)." But we're hearing conflicting info from those nefarious "unnamed Apple sources" lurking in the shadows. Some of them are saying "Seybold," which is at the end of the month, which seems more likely just because it's still almost a month away, but Seybold isn't exactly the greatest event at which to unveil a consumer product. Other Apple sources claim that, in fact, there will be no new iMac this quarter at all, since the current ones are still selling so well; that puts Kihei's introduction no earlier than October. Time to start up an office pool!

 
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Takes A Licking... (8/3/99)
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We admit, we were more than a little disappointed when we first saw an iBook up close and personal. And not because of the styling, or the color choices, or anything like that-- we were bummed out because of the iBook's sheer size. It's a behemoth. It's bigger than a Wall Street PowerBook G3, and its color scheme makes it look even bigger than that (since white and orange aren't exactly as slimming as Wall Street's sleek black). And beyond that, it's heavy; 6.6 pounds according to the Apple reps at the Expo, and 6.7 pounds according to Apple's web site-- heavier than a current PowerBook, which packs a lot more functionality, such as a bigger screen, swappable expansion bays, a PC card slot, video out, an extra USB port, stereo speakers, and a built-in microphone. In fact, the iBook's feature set is minimal enough that it probably could have been a less-than-four-pounds subnotebook, as the rumors originally implied it would be. So what's with the bigness and the heaviness?

Well, we think Andy Ihnatko has answered our question. In his latest column at MacCentral, he regales us with the tale of his trip to Apple to spend some quality time with an iBook. He was intrigued with reports that the iBook had been designed to withstand "life in a backpack," so he decided to test the unit's ruggedness. First he tested the innovative latchless lid-closing mechanism by throwing the iBook in the air a few times; on the final toss, he even "grazed a lighting fixture," but the iBook stayed shut. As he continued to ask questions of the three Apple reps present, he decided to "swing the iBook into the table leg over and over again," but the iBook showed no signs of damage. In fact, Andy notes that "near the end, [he] was swinging it into the table with considerably greater gusto than [he] had originally intended, but no matter"; the iBook still booted up just fine, and looked as good as new.

Now, what's really telling about this whole ordeal is the fact that, while Andy was inflicting these horrors on the poor iBook, the three Apple reps in the room "didn't say a word" about the abuse. They were apparently perfectly confident that the iBook could withstand the punishment without breaking a virtual sweat, as it were. (They stopped him when he tried to bend the handle all the way back, but hey, nothing's invulnerable.) So all the "wasted space" in the iBook's design apparently acts as some pretty heavy-duty cushioning, giving the system the ability to survive (hopefully) the rigors of day-to-day schoolkid handling. Suddenly we're less reticent about lugging a 6.7-pound, large-binder-size iBook in our shoulder bags; to us, knowing that it'll survive the trip is worth a sore shoulder or two.

 
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