And here we thought we'd all moved past the stage of listening to rumors that big developers are abandoning the Mac platform in droves. Ever since Intuit gave up on the Mac last April (true!) and then quickly reversed its stance not one week later (after having been given a behind-the-scenes glimpse of the top secret iMac), we figured that would be the last "jumping ship" story we'd hear for a while. So imagine our surprise when we caught wind of the rumors that Adobe, long a stalwart Mac developer dependent on the platform for its success, was planning to cease Macintosh development.

Consternation! Uproar! Could it be? Apple and Adobe essentially built the entire desktop publishing business on a foundation of Macintosh, LaserWriter, Photoshop, and Pagemaker. But no-- the rumors are nothing but rumors, at least according to an Adobe spokeswoman, who called the statement that Adobe was dropping Macintosh support both "very damaging" and "very untrue" in a Reuters story. Sure, they've made more Windows-y decisions in the past, but given Apple's new direction, what few Windows-only software they've released may soon surface in Mac versions as well. For instance, the consumer-level PhotoDeluxe is a natural for Apple's iMac, the current darling of the media. And regardless, the big guns-- Photoshop, Pagemaker, Illustrator, etc.-- are here to stay.

Perhaps what the whole sordid affair tells us most is how insecure everyone still is about the future of the Mac, regardless of how irrational that insecurity may be. Sure, sales are up, market share shows signs of growth, and Apple remains consistently profitable, but old fears die hard, so it's easy to get swept up in a rumor that plays strongly on the worry that Windows NT could sweep the desktop publishing market right out of Apple's arms. But as many a graphics grunt who's flirted with the NT floozy can tell you, it's just not the same...

With all the activity heating up over the impending "Redmond Justice" season premiere (currently scheduled for September 23rd, though that could certainly change, given Microsoft's latest "let's subpoena several thousand documents from several really huge companies and only give them a one-week deadline" gambit), another lesser courtroom drama may have dropped somewhat from the public eye. Yes, the viewing public has a woefully short memory, and so the Nielsen ratings have dropped significantly on Sun's lawsuit against the Redmond Giant. But to be fair, there hasn't been a lot of activity in the case to hold the public's interest...

Think back hard; at the beginning of last year's television season, Sun sued Microsoft for violating its Java license, citing Microsoft's attempt to spike the brew with a decidedly Windows-flavored shot of code. Coming back to you now? Sun wanted Microsoft either to use true cross-platform Java as specified, or remove the "Java-compatible" logo from its non-compliant products. Once the suit was filed, it seemed that nothing exciting happened for months-- it was just one more legal battle to toss on the table for Microsoft's army of lawyers to tackle. But the slow wheels of justice crank inevitably onward, and now, just eleven months later, oral arguments in the case have been completed. While details are sketchy because the hearings were closed to the public (lots of juicy trade secrets were getting bounced around in there), a Computer Reseller News article quotes Sun's lawyer as saying that the arguments "went extremely well for Sun."

Of course, we've yet to see a lawyer be quoted as saying that a hearing went particularly badly for their clients; as you'd expect, Microsoft's lawyers also said they "performed well at the hearing." But still, it's an intriguing thought; while the whole world watches "Redmond Justice" because its outcome holds the potential to change Microsoft in a drastic manner, perhaps it's the Java case that will make the real difference; if Microsoft is somehow prevented from contaminating Java and the language fulfills its cross-platform, OS-agnostic promise, Windows may take a big hit, which is exactly what Microsoft is so afraid of. See, there's some drama there-- it's a shame that the case doesn't have a better publicist, no?

Ladies and gentlemen, we at AtAT are humbled by a paranoia far richer and more fertile than ours. At this point we step aside and turn the episode over to Russell Swan, a longtime faithful viewer whose nose for conspiracy is unparalleled:

How could you have missed the big story? Ken Starr is on the Microsoft payroll!

Thursday was the day the story about Bill Gates making Palmer an offer he couldn't refuse broke. On any normal day that story would have gotten major news coverage. As soon as the story broke it was announced that Ken Starr's report, which had an indefinite delivery date, was being delivered then. Coincidence? Only for people who think Elvis is dead!!! As a result of MS employee Ken's actions, Don Bill's persuausion methods were ignored by all the broadcast media.

An even more sinister possibility - We know that Clinton golfs with Bill G. Maybe the entire bimbroglio/lewinskygate affair is a "Wag the Dog" exercise intended to distract our minds from the real story (in which case, the bombing of Sudan and Afghanistan become what?).