You know those ads for weight-loss products, acne medication, or wrinkle cream that show "before" and "after" photos of someone who's supposedly benefited from using the product? In particular, we're thinking about the ads for the really "questionable" products, like, say, a bracelet that is claimed to reduce fat throughout the body via healing magnetic waves, or whatever-- you know the ones we mean. In some of the more blatantly false ads in that genre, the "before" and "after" pictures seem to be two entirely different people... unless, of course, those healing magnetic waves not only stripped two hundred pounds from the subject's frame, but also magically bleached her hair, gave her a rich, golden tan, and made her three inches taller.

Forgive us, we're rambling again. The point (and there is a point, we promise) is that if you take a snapshot of Apple today and compare it to a picture of Apple from three years ago, you're going to swear you're looking at two different companies. And we're not even talking about the obvious things, like the financial solvency, the energized product line, and the tone of the media coverage. At a deeper lever, one of the fundamental differences we see is that the Apple of today seems almost unable to launch a strategy and have it fail.

For example, take that Internet strategy announced less than two months ago; the addition of iTools, iCards, and iReview to Apple's web site has drawn record-breaking traffic. As The Mac Observer notes, PC Data's numbers show Apple's web site as the most-trafficked site among those run by computer hardware companies. Apple's 961,000 unique visitors last week put it well ahead of the runner-up, Egghead.com's 793,000. Apple.com logged over three times as many unique visitors as the ninth-place site, Outpost.com; it's estimated that one out of every fifty-five people on the Internet visited Apple's site last week. For an online strategy, that's a far cry from the virtual Hindenburg known as "eWorld."

So the miracle balm Apple's been using for the past few years really seems to be doing the trick. (Can we get Steve Jobs in a handy, easy-to-apply ointment?) Sure, there have been a few less-than-spectacular successes; that "three pizzas" consumer loan wasn't the smash success it could have been, and even iReview's looking a bit tired, what with only those same eleven computer sites reviewed since it went live... but so far, we haven't seen anything quite as disastrous as Copland or OpenDoc. Thumbs up to Steve, and "before" and "after" pics we can really believe.

Everyone with a pulse and at least one moderately-functional eyeball knows just how badly Dell wants to be Apple, right? Sure, it's only natural for others in the industry to steal a few pages from Apple's book; heck, it's basically tradition at this point. But Mike Dell went way beyond stealing a few pages-- with the comes-in-colors consumer WebPC, the also-comes-in-colors consumer Inspiron 3800 laptop, the wireless networking options, etc., it's easy to see that he took the whole book, including the Gulfstream brochure Steve was using as a bookmark. In fact, if Mike Dell doesn't buy himself a jet by the year's end, we'll be really surprised.

But here's the interesting thing: apparently the unprecedented degree of Dell's stalker-like copycat behavior has inspired others in the industry to get a little cozier with Apple's various moves. The latest one that stands out in our eyes is Gateway's team-up with OfficeMax. According to CNET, Gateway will "build and staff 'store-within-a-store' outlets in more than 1,000 OfficeMax outlets." Sound at all familiar? Oh, sure, it's not exactly like Apple's deal with CompUSA a couple of years ago-- for one thing, Gateway will be the exclusive computer sold at OfficeMax-- but it's close enough to raise a few eyebrows.

So we figure it's time for Apple to start stealing some ideas right back. The whole CompUSA "store-within-a-store" thing didn't work out as perfectly as it might have, since at many locations the Apple section turned into a sort of "Mac Ghetto," neglected and lost amid a sea of competing Wintels. We figure Apple should follow Gateway's lead and book an exclusive deal with some non-computer-selling national chain for maximum exposure. How about The Gap? Uncle Steve's on the Gap Board, Gap CEO Mickey Drexler's on Apple's Board-- let's see some synergy, here. Why not sell iMacs and iBooks in Gap stores nationwide? They're stylish enough to be considered accessories, right? "Everyone On Macs." Oh, and let's try to keep the stocking ladders out of the Apple area this time, okay, folks?

We admit, it took a little longer than we expected, but less than a week after Windows 2000 made its official debut, the first Win2K-specific virus has been identified. According to PC World, the little critter's named "W2K.Infis.4608" (awww, ain't that cute?), and while it has yet to be spotted "in the wild," it may herald lots of viral fun to come for hapless Windows 2000 users.

As it turns out, W2K.Infis.4608 (oh, heck, let's just call it "Lenny") is a pretty benign little beast; "the level of destruction from the virus is negligible." And plus, it's disappointingly easy to spot; all you have to do is check your "Windows NT system 32 drivers folder" for a file called "inf.sys." Or, even easier, open up the Registry and look for a key of "hklmsystemCurrentControlSetServicesinf." Something like that will leap right out at you. Don't fret, though; we're sure that new Windows 2000 viruses are on their way-- ones that are harder to spot than Lenny, and more destructive, to boot.

The best part of all, though, is PC World's reminder that "most 32-bit viruses written for Windows 95 and 98 are also Windows 2000-compatible." Hmmm, suppose that's one of the selling points Microsoft put on the box? "Windows 2000: 100% compatible with all 32-bit viruses!" Our understanding is that Microsoft's engineers worked long and hard to build in compatibility with older 16-bit viruses, too, but were unable to do so before the shipping deadline. It'll probably make it into the first Service Pack, though.