Since there aren't any earth-shattering developments rocking the Apple world right this second, we figured we'd fill you in on the recent death in our little computer family and the progress in our quest for resurrection. For those of you who missed our last episode, Victoria (a beloved PowerTower Pro and AtAT's primary production system) passed away in the early hours of Friday morning. She was found powered off, and neither the keyboard power key nor her own front-mounted startup button provoked any response. Switching her power cord with another made no difference, and moving her to another electrical outlet also proved fruitless. Patient was pronounced dead at 6:48 AM; her last recorded ASCII output was "2601440," an automated entry logged at 4:30 AM EDT to note the then-current Nielsen ratings of her child, As the Apple Turns. She worked right up to the end, poor dear. Her passing came as a shock to us, her family, as she'd been in outwardly perfect health just hours before. Cause of death was assumed to be sudden power supply failure, since all efforts to revive her resulted in neither a startup chime nor disk spin-up; this fact has yet to be confirmed via multimeter autopsy, however.

Victoria's death announcement on AtAT provoked literally dozens of responses from concerned viewers (over fifty at last count), offering both condolences and advice on raising the dead. Replacement power supplies for Power Computing systems are evidently not difficult to come by, judging by the list of vendors who reportedly have the part available: Shreve Systems, AllMac, MacResQ, and Galaxy Online were the most frequently mentioned sources. Lots of people noted that Apple's required to service Power Computing systems for a total of seven years post-buyout, which means we could just bring Victoria in for Apple-authorized power supply replacement if we were so inclined. Several viewers also mentioned that a generic PC power supply ought to work fine in a PowerTower Pro, and should be much less expensive as well-- though personally we're far more comfortable finding an exact match when it comes to posthumous organ replacement. (We wouldn't want an "Abbie Normal" power supply screwing things up in our revived darling.)

A few viewers mentioned just how happy they were when they replaced their Power Computing clones with honest-to-goodness G4s, but we're not quite ready to give up on the old girl just yet. Once Mac OS X is shipping we'll probably retire her and move a Graphite-and-Aqua workhorse into her place, but that's a ways off yet-- and in any case, we wouldn't feel right leaving her dead in a closet. And apparently we're not alone in our desire to keep a PCC unit cranking along; many, many fellow Power Computing users noted that PowerWatch is an excellent and active support group for those of us with these "orphaned" systems, and participants in those message boards may well have lots of suggestions for reputable and cost-effective sources of maintenance parts.

Lastly, we had one suggestion that made us think of Scully at the autopsy table, discovering that the corpse had not died of a heart attack as previously supposed, but rather of an alien-hybrid organic toxin injected into the back of the neck. Faithful viewer Jeff Berman reports that when his early Power Computing clone died, the power supply "tested at zero volts," but the problem was not in fact the power supply. Instead, his motherboard battery had died, which for some reason "completely shut down" his system. His suggestion is to replace that battery first to see what happens. Sounds like a cheap and easy first step to us.

So, our course is now clear: tonight we'll go hunting for a replacement battery, and if that doesn't help, tomorrow we'll get on the horn and have a replacement power supply shipped to us ASAP. Hopefully Victoria will be back from the Great Silicon Dump In The Sky no later than Wednesday night. We'll keep you posted on her progress. And thanks to all of you for your kind support in this time of sorrow. Now, off to play Dr. Frankenstein...

Hey, are you a big fan of Computer Hardware Web Site Racing? Do you follow PC Data's weekly site visit statistics the way other people follow the pennant race? Do you cheer heartily when Apple's site takes the top spot, and boo and hiss when Compaq snakes into first place instead? Do friends and loved ones merely sigh, roll their eyes, and reach for the well-thumbed "Psychiatic Services" section of the Yellow Pages when you do this? Well, then odds are you're currently stomping around the office and snapping at coworkers, because according to MacObserver, Apple's still in second place right now, with Compaq locked squarely in the winner's circle. C'mon, cheer up-- Apple's still getting more unique visitors per week than Gateway, Dell, Hewlett-Packard, and IBM, right?

But what's this? Sounds like a scandal's about the shake the world of web site racing to its very foundations, and MacObserver's leading the way with a hard-hitting exposé. When these intrepid journalists wanted to know just how PC Data got its numbers and ranked the sites, they sent in undercover investigative reporters to infiltrate the highest echelons of PC Data and discover what methods were used. (Oh. alright, so they just picked up a phone and asked. Same difference.) You may be shocked at what they discovered: PC Data's information is based the usage patterns of "120,000 people who install a software application on their machine" which acts like a virtual Nielsen box and allows the company to track those users' web movements "in 15 minute chunks." Well, guess what? Not one of those 120,000 "representative" surfers is using a Mac.

That's right; PC Data's sample Internet user base consists wholly of PC users. That special monitoring software the company uses is a Windows-only product. Say, you don't suppose that only counting Windows systems might skew the results strongly away from Apple's favor, do you? (Duh.) Seen in the light of this juicy piece of info, Apple's current runner-up status and occasional first-place finish seem practically miraculous-- PC users are visiting Apple's site more than Gateway's. So now you know why Compaq's decidedly uninteresting site keeps edging Apple's out of first place. If you've been laying any cabbage on Apple to win, it may be time to have a stern word or two with your bookie...

It's been done to death by now, but just in case any of you were as unwired as we were this weekend (as we drove doggedly back and forth through Galveston, TX looking in vain for a nonexistent hotel-- don't ask), we simply can't resist discussing one of the more bizarre twists to issue forth from the warped minds of the "Redmond Justice" writers since the show first hit the airwaves lo these many moons ago. Apparently a rumor got started that the government of Canada, our neighbors to the Frosty North, actually offered Microsoft asylum and safe haven. Beset on all sides by the U.S. government's antitrust watchdogs, the Redmond-based giant was reportedly considering picking up and moving its digs a hundred miles north over the border into British Columbia, in a desperate attempt to avoid a corporate breakup. Faithful viewer Brent Marykuca (a Canadian himself) was the first to hook us up with this juicy tale of international intrigue, in the form of a BBC news story.

Reportedly, the Canadian government pretty much said, "well, if the U.S. doesn't want you, your 20,000 jobs and world-affecting economic clout are more than welcome up here, eh?" The BBC notes that such a move would have a "devastating effect on the economy of the north-west corner of the United States." That much is true; which means, of course, that if Canada were able to woo Microsoft over the border, we figure that a declaration of war wouldn't be too far behind. Fortunately (or unfortunately, depending on your level of bloodlust), we don't have to worry about such a South Parkesque scenario right now; as AppleLinks and dozens of other sites now report, whoever came up with that rumor at the BBA was evidently snorting Drano, because Microsoft says it just ain't so.

Given that a relocation across the border 1) isn't practical and 2) wouldn't protect Microsoft from the long arm of the antitrust law anyway, we're going to have to assume that the rumors are just vapor. That hasn't stopped the likes of The Register from having lots of fun with the idea of Microsoft retreating to "Billfeld Island" to conquer the world, as pointed out by faithful viewer Russell Swan-- who also notes that Bill Gates really does own a secret island: Palmyra Island in the Pacific. Hmmm... And faithful viewer Matthew Guerrieri notes the following: "You know, Steve Ballmer does kind of look like Inspector Fenwick. And Bill does kind of talk like Dudley. And Steve Jobs does kind of look like Snidely Whiplash." There is something going on...