Uh-oh-- where's the love, Bill? If there are any viewers out there who actually felt that the Apple-Microsoft "truce" of August 1997 would really bring a new era of cooperation and peace to one of world's greatest on-again-off-again mortal struggles, we've got some friendly advice for you: don't buy any bridges, and be very wary of anyone who tries to sell you real estate in Florida. Sure, Microsoft invested $150 million in special non-voting Apple stock and committed to continuing the development of a Mac version of Office, but that doesn't mean it's all hugs and goofy smiles between Cupertino and Redmond. But you could have guessed that from Apple's testimony against Microsoft in the "Redmond Justice" antitrust trial...

So it shouldn't come as any big surprise when Bill Gates takes the occasional swipe at Apple, as he recently did at last week's financial analyst gathering hosted by Microsoft. A CNET article quotes Bill as having said, "The one thing Apple's providing now is leadership in colors. It won't take long for us to catch up with that, I don't think." Color? Color us amused, because those sound like the words of a worried billionaire. So what's getting on his nerves? Could it be the fact that the number one selling retail computer in June (the iMac, of course) doesn't run Windows? Aw, shucks. In fact, we find it interesting that Bill's even openly admitting that Apple is a Microsoft competitor, since it was such a crux of Microsoft's antitrust defense-- specifically, the testimony of economist Richard Schmalensee ("SCHMALENSEE!!")-- that there is no "operating system market" in which they could possibly hold a monopoly.

But we digress. (Like that's new...) The heart of the matter is this: what, exactly, does Bill plan to do in order to leapfrog Apple's "color leadership," given that Microsoft doesn't even make computers? Ponder no more, Grasshopper, for longtime faithful viewer David Puett has the answer: "No longer will Microsoft's NT offer only a 'Blue screen of Death (BSOD)'. Microsoft will now offer the 'Screen of Death' in 5 colors." Oh, sure, you may laugh now, but that's a solid Microsoftian plan if ever I've heard one. Then, once the color gap is closed, perhaps Microsoft can focus on the gaps that Bill doesn't want to acknowledge in public-- like ease of use, streaming video quality, and all that other inconsequential stuff.