Haute Couture (12/28/99)
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Outbreak! It's spreading like wildfire, with no slowdown in sight! Wait, hold on, don't call the Centers for Disease Control just yet-- we're not talking about some kind of icky infectious flesh-eating bacterium, or even the Windows virus du jour. We're talking about color. Beige is out, we all knew that; it's so 1997. Bondi Blue enjoyed a brief celebrity in 1998. In the first half of 1999, Blueberry ruled the roost, with four other fruit flavors bringing up its rear. But as soon as the Power Mac G4 touched down a few months ago, Graphite's been all the rage, baby. The coveted metallic grey with the liquid look was first reserved for the elite professional G4, but soon spread to the high end of the iMac DV line, as well, gracing the transparent shell of the Special Edition. The new "Pismo" PowerBook expected to be unveiled at the Expo in a couple of weeks is rumored to have Graphite accents. And now Apple Insider claims that the iBook is the next Apple product to dress in Graphite curves.

Finally, an iBook even for folks as insecure about their masculinity as John Dvorak! If Blueberry and Tangerine are too girly for you, fear not-- Graphite's a nice "manly" color. In fact, it may be macho enough to counter those niggling worries that the iBook looks like a makeup compact or a clutch purse. Are you a "suit" who can't see toting a bright blue or orange laptop into a high-powered meeting? Graphite's staid enough to be welcome in even the stodgiest business setting. Or maybe you've been holding off on getting an iBook because neither Tangerine nor Blueberry works with your decor or your wardrobe. That's the beauty of Graphite; it goes with anything.

It's just a rumor, mind you, and a Graphite iBook may not surface for months. We'd personally be quite surprised to hear any mention of it during the Expo, since the current iBooks are still selling like fezzes at a Shriners' convention. But here's a particularly interesting little side-rumor: the Graphite iBook may wind up having a DVD-ROM drive instead of the current CD-ROM unit. Mmmmm, a portable Graphite DVD player that just happens to be a Mac as well. When (if?) it ships, we may well be looking to trade in our Blueberry model.

 
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And Now For A Word From Our Sponsors
 

From the writer/creator of AtAT, a Pandemic Dad Joke taken WAYYYYYY too far

 

The above scene was taken from the 12/28/99 episode:

December 28, 1999: Rumors of a Y2K terrorist anti-Mac assault are iffy, sure, but the Mac's vulnerability to a new denial of service attack is no laughing matter. Meanwhile, Graphite's the color to watch, as it bleeds its way into Apple's portable lines, and plenty of happy people got Macs for the holidays, but those who received a Compaq instead may have to resolve to get on Santa's "nice" list next year...

Other scenes from that episode:

  • 1999: No Shirt, No Shoes... (12/28/99)   Okay, face it: you're all just a little disappointed in the way Y2K's shaping up to be a big non-event. Sure, as caring, compassionate social creatures we all thrive on the continued comfort and well-being of our fellow humans yadda yadda yadda, but come on-- here we are, scant days away from the calendar rollover, and there's nary a panic attack in sight...

  • 2001: For Goodness Sake (12/28/99)   While "The Holidays" overall aren't exactly over yet, the gift-giving portion is. The boxes have all been opened, the pretty paper's all been torn to shreds bound for the landfill, and the phrase "it's just what I wanted" has been uttered gazillions of times, with varying degrees of truthfulness...

Or view the entire episode as originally broadcast...

Vote Early, Vote Often!
Why did you tune in to this '90s relic of a soap opera?
Nostalgia is the next best thing to feeling alive
My name is Rip Van Winkle and I just woke up; what did I miss?
I'm trying to pretend the last 20 years never happened
I mean, if it worked for Friends, why not?
I came here looking for a receptacle in which to place the cremated remains of my deceased Java applets (think about it)

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