We know, we know-- things on "Redmond Justice" have slowed to a crawl recently. But don't tell us, tell the producers; most of the action is probably happening at the bargaining table, but ever since it was decreed that the settlement talks would not be televised, we poor drama fiends have been starving for the twists and turns of the good old days. You know, it happens: a show with a rabid fan base runs a couple of seasons too long, the original writers leave, the cast seems bored because they're all itching to pursue movie careers, and the overall quality of the whole project just tanks. Witness the last few years of Married... With Children for a textbook example. Heck, much as it pains us to say it, season 6 of The X-Files was pretty much a dog, too; luckily the current season is much improved.

That's not to say that nothing's happening on "Redmond Justice"; heck, there was a fun incident earlier this week in which Microsoft lobbied Congress not to break up the company-- according to The Register, Microsoft likened such a remedy to a "regulatory death sentence." See, that's the kind of drama and hyperbole we're looking for-- but given that even the email Microsoft sent to Congress likely constitutes a breach of the "no talking about the settlement negotiations" mandate, such nuggets are few and far between. Which is why everyone went all nutsy with antitrust glee when, for a brief moment, it appeared that Bill Gates himself was offering to open up the Windows source code to avoid seeing his company dismantled. Faithful viewer Jerry O'Neil, as always, has his finger on the pulse of the monopoly. He sent us to a Bloomberg News article which claimed that Big Bad Bill would open-source Windows if it'd get the government off his back once and for all.

Of course, Microsoft's spin doctors are denying that Gates made that offer-- and they're doing it so vehemently, they've discovered six new patentable methods of denial in the past twelve hours. But the speed with which the story wormed its way through the 'net was truly a wonder to behold. It's like we said; people are starving for "Redmond Justice" action, so any juicy rumor's going to spread like wildfire. In any case, if a settlement is in the stars, we'll know soon enough; final arguments in the trial are scheduled for this coming Tuesday. We're finally in the home stretch, and soon we'll see if Microsoft is really willing to release its death-grip on the Windows source code to avoid annihilation.