Is The World Ready? (5/29/00)
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Everybody loves iCards, right? Arguably, it's the most engaging aspect of Apple's whole Internet strategy; iTools is a bit useful, but it's not exactly "gee-whiz" quite yet, and iReview-- well, let's just say it's still got room for improvement. (Reviewing AtAT might be a big step in the right direction, hint hint.) But iCards is pretty nifty; Apple could easily have fallen into the "just another e-cards service" trap, but didn't. It's a lot of fun to pick a classy picture, add your own text, and mail it off, secure in the knowledge that your correspondent will receive a custom-made JPEG file instead of a just a gibberishy URL pointing them to a garish GIF animation and a cheesy MIDI version of the Gap Band's "You Dropped a Bomb On Me."

The only real drawback to Apple's approach is that some would consider it a waste of bandwidth; whereas a URL is only a few dozen bytes long and lets the recipient choose if and when to view the "card," Apple's iCards are generally about 30 KB that streams right into your inbox, whether you were expecting it or not. Granted, 30 KB isn't exactly gargantuan, even over the slowest dialup connections, but still, for some people it's the principle of the thing. And if AppleInsider is right about where Uncle Steve plans to take iCards next, well, soon it may be a problem in practice, too.

See, the neatest thing about iCards is that if you're an iTools user, you can drag your own JPEG files to the "Pictures" folder on your iDisk and those pictures become available for you when you make iCards. Our custom Stalin-in-a-party-hat birthday iCard is a work of art, for example. Now, if you've used your iDisk at all, you've probably noticed that there's also a folder there for movies-- which means you can see where this is going. Apparently Steve's planning to integrate iCards with iMovie, so that someday you'll be able to send iCard birth announcements to all your friends featuring full-color video of your blessed child waving his little pink arms (or of the birth itself, if that's your bag). And while that's a natural progression, we can't help but wonder whether Steve's planning some kind of file size limit to iMovieCards, or whether he just figures everyone's got a T3 piped right into the living room. Personally, even with a cable modem connection, we're not thrilled at the idea of receiving a 12.6 MB iCard celebrating the completion of cousin Johnny's toilet training in graphic detail-- and not just because of file size reasons.

 
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From the writer/creator of AtAT, a Pandemic Dad Joke taken WAYYYYYY too far

 

The above scene was taken from the 5/29/00 episode:

May 29, 2000: Wondering what the next PowerBook will be like? How about the PowerBook after that? Meanwhile, Steve Jobs plans to take iCards to the next bandwidth-sucking level, and Microsoft's "due process" argument may not go far in the appeals process after all...

Other scenes from that episode:

  • 2320: The NEXT Next PowerBook (5/29/00)   We're not entirely sure why, but generally it seems that of all Apple's product lines, it's the PowerBook that spawns the most drooling, rabid, foaming-at-the-mouth rumormongering among the loyal fans...

  • 2322: Due Process THIS, Buddy (5/29/00)   Thankfully, at least one legal eagle seems to think that "Redmond Justice" is still heading for a satisfying series finale-- instead of one in which Microsoft wins its appeal. While we shared many viewers' joy when Judge Jackson flatly denied the Redmond Giant six more months to stall show why a breakup is unwarranted, we were a smidge worried that the judge's "no more process" mandate might give Microsoft a big advantage when the case makes its inevitable way to the appeals court...

Or view the entire episode as originally broadcast...

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