Are you an intellectual property lawyer with some serious teeth? Do you eat NDA-violating, trademark-abusing, copyright-ignoring little punks for breakfast? When you walk the halls of your firm, do people make "daaa-dum daaa-dum" noises until someone murmurs, "We're going to need a bigger boat"? Then if you're looking for clean-up work in the Santa Clara Valley, has Apple got a job for you...

Thanks to a tip from The Register, we dug up this job posting over at Apple's site: the company seeks a Trademark Counsel, who will be tasked with "U.S. and International trademark and copyright searching, filing, prosecution, maintenance and enforcement, including trademark litigation." Yes, sign up today and you, too, can sue leaking John Does, issue cease-and-desist orders to infringing web sites, and nail to the wall all those nefarious PC manufacturers who would dare sully the iMac's reputation by overusing translucent colored plastic. Katie, AtAT's resident fact-checker and Goddess of Minutiae, just happens to be an intellectual property litigator in her "spare time"-- and we imagine that right about now, visions of sunny California torts are dancing in her head.

Anyway, whether or not skewering trademark violators for Apple is your idea of a dream job, the fact that Steve is beefing up his elite team of legal hatchetmen may indicate a further crackdown on rumors and an even more rigorous protection of Apple's valuable intellectual property. In addition to the Trademark Counsel slot, we notice that Apple's also seeking a pair of patent lawyers to round out the squad. So is this just normal job turnover, or a strengthening of the legal echelon that's just one step in a grand plan to secure Apple's Knowledge Turf at any and all costs? After all, knowledge is power.

Incidentally, if you do wind up taking that Trademark Counsel job, don't forget the plucky little well-meaning soap opera who told you about it in the first place. No need to thank us; just keep those cease-and-desist orders far, far away...