Unnatural Selection (9/22/00)
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No issue has divided the Macintosh community as bitterly as Apple's latest product color, Key Lime. Reactions to the glowing green hue are typically polar in nature; people either love it or hate it. Or love to hate it. Or love it because other people hate it. In any event, right now Apple's only offering Key Lime products via the Apple Store, both to play it safe on the inventory front (since a warehouse filled with unsold Key Lime iBooks constitutes a hazardous materials containment facility, and the paperwork on those things is just murder), and to prevent the untold number of seizures and heart attacks that would undoubtedly result if customers with weak constitutions were suddenly and unexpectedly exposed to a Key Lime display model in a retail store.

That said, we at AtAT now strongly suspect that Key Lime will catch on in a huge way. Not only have we heard from scads of Mac fans who are in love with the new color, but we're also starting to develop our own appreciation for it. (We'd say that it's growing on us, but you'd be amazed how many people can misinterpret a simple statement like "this glowing green color is starting to grow on us." The last thing we need right now is to be thrown into quarantine.) For one thing, based on Apple's streaming-on-demand QuickTime footage of Key Lime's introduction, the color isn't really the toxic green that Apple's iBook page implies. Don't get us wrong-- it's still bright, it's still pretty obnoxious, and it'll still make those suited businessmen with their boxy black Wintel laptops frown and shake their heads in disapproval. But the shade is somehow a bit less physically painful to look at than Apple's web photos imply.

More importantly, though, faithful viewer Dan revealed a feature of Key Lime that we've long suspected but never been able to confirm-- until now. Dan pointed out that Studio Web has posted a streaming QuickTime interview with Dave Russell, Apple's Product Manager of Consumer Portable Devices. In it, Dave reveals that, yes indeedy, Key Lime luminesces in ultraviolet light. So if you think the color glows now, wait 'til you see it under a black light. Groovy, baby. Longtime viewers will recall that a Blueberry iBook under black light is less spectacular-- the handle glows, and the keys sort of do, but that's about it. So for those of you who need a portable that'll really knock your friends dead at your next black light party, Key Lime is here to save the day.

This latest discovery about Key Lime's hidden capacities reveals that the color is already taking certain markets by storm-- such as artists and genetic engineers. A faithful viewer who wishes to remain anonymous sent us over to an ABC News story about Alba, a mutant rabbit whose normally white fur glows bright green under black light. In other words, yes, in the right conditions, Alba is basically a Key Lime bunny. Coincidence? Ha! Clearly Apple's market research team really has its finger on the pulse of today's movers and shakers. Just you wait; Key Lime iBooks may seem a little weird now, but soon every frivolously-gene-splicing friend of an artist will own one.

 
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The above scene was taken from the 9/22/00 episode:

September 22, 2000: Think Key Lime's a bust? Well, wait until you see the bunny. Meanwhile, Mike Dell continues his psychotic compulsion to make his company as much like Apple as possible, and a reference to the PPC G5 in the SETI@home stats has some folks dreaming of a zippy new chip...

Other scenes from that episode:

  • 2566: ...& Mediocre Artists TRACE (9/22/00)   At first, Mike Dell's apparent fascination with Steve Jobs was amusing; less than two years after his public comment about how Apple should be shut down, the guy sort of recanted when he gave the public a sneak peek of what would turn out to be the ill-fated, iMac-inspired WebPC...

  • 2567: G5: The Truth Is Out There (9/22/00)   We know, we know-- Friday rolls around and all you people want to do is turn off your brains and log some quality goofing-off time. But while rest and relaxation does you good, it's not in your best interests to go totally slack, intellectually speaking...

Or view the entire episode as originally broadcast...

Vote Early, Vote Often!
Why did you tune in to this '90s relic of a soap opera?
Nostalgia is the next best thing to feeling alive
My name is Rip Van Winkle and I just woke up; what did I miss?
I'm trying to pretend the last 20 years never happened
I mean, if it worked for Friends, why not?
I came here looking for a receptacle in which to place the cremated remains of my deceased Java applets (think about it)

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