At first we were doubtful, but after a few conversations with so-called "normal people," we now accept the fact that there may be a few of you who didn't line up on the sidewalk overnight to snag the first copy of the new Steve Jobs tell-all biography as soon as it hit the shelves. Indeed, you can be excused for having missed the event, since the delay in publication (which some conspiracy theorists, including the author himself, still say was engineered by Steve himself) messed with the release schedule, and consequently, fewer people were aware that the book's debut was finally rescheduled for last Tuesday. But it's out now, complete with a new non-copyright-violating cover photo, and when we last checked, The Second Coming of Steve Jobs by Alan Deutschman was the 36th best-selling book over at Amazon.com-- and ranked 7th among buyers at Apple Computer. Everyone wants a piece of Steve!

Now, if you didn't realize the book had shipped, you're trapped in some bizarre universe that has no brick-and-mortar book stores, and Amazon's next-day delivery just isn't fast enough for you, fear not: as faithful viewer Mr. Nick pointed out to us, Salon has published some excerpts from the book to keep your head from exploding while you anxiously await the arrival of the FedEx guy. Read how Steve's constant phone harassment eventually sent former veep of Developer Relations Heidi Roizen looking for a new job. Marvel at how his frequent uninvited drop-ins at the house of Apple director and Intuit CEO Bill Campbell sent Bill's dog into a tizzy. Witness Steve's sensitive side, as he cries upon first seeing the landmark "Think different" commercial. And thrill to the "reign of terror" that had the denizens of Apple fearing for their jobs, even as Steve outlawed smoking, banned dogs, and replaced the cafeteria staff with the vegan-friendly chef from his favorite restaurant.

All this, of course, is but the merest taste of the juicy material that comprises the three-hundred-odd pages of Deutschman's so-called "hatchet job," but it should be enough to satisfy you while you await the arrival of the real thing. Meanwhile, what diabolical scheme will Steve hatch to exact his revenge? And will the dirt that Deutschman kicked up muddy Steve's chances for the White House on November 7th?