As the Apple Turns: Scene 2845: The Audience Is Listening (2/6/01)

The Audience Is Listening (2/6/01)

Do you have an AirPort wireless network? Do you feel like James Bond as you access your company's top secret and super-sensitive design plans wirelessly from your brand new titanium PowerBook G4? Do you cherish the mental picture of dozens of scantily-clad but lethal female operatives throwing themselves at your feet, all because there's no technology sexier than the AirPort-enabled PowerBook that you currently own and use, amazing stud that you are? That's nice. Meanwhile, in the real world, some teenage kid with a higher-than-average computer aptitude, a faltering moral compass, and way too much time on his hands is parked outside and has just intercepted those super-sensitive design plans, which he plans to sell to your company's competitor. Your plans just got handed to Blofeld, which means that the kid gets the Bond Girls and you get tossed in the piranha tank.

"Not so!" you cry. "I use encryption with my AirPort network, and therefore my data is secure and those exceptionally hot women will be all over my svelte, masculine, tuxedoed form like white on rice!" Encryption, shmencryption; sorry, Skippy, but according to a Reuters article first pointed out to us by faithful agent Robert Fernando, various and sundry evildoers can exploit holes in the Wired Equivalent Privacy system that will enable them to "eavesdrop on or even disrupt" wireless 802.11 networks such as AirPort's. By using the wireless capabilities of your sexy new PowerBook, your ultra-cool super-spy self just delivered the plans right into SPECTRE's hands. And with a resounding "D'oh!" your transformation from James Bond to Homer Simpson is complete.

Of course, since it's the 802.11 standard that contains the security "issue" and not AirPort itself, the problem isn't Apple's fault, nor is it limited to Apple's implementation; "more than 30 companies" who make 802.11-based wireless networking gear are affected by the flaw. So if you've got a wireless network and you've been using it to access sensitive information, you might want to reconsider just how much of an inconvenience that CAT-5 Ethernet cable really is. While it's true that a secret agent man of action isn't going to score nearly as many Bond Girl trysts while tethered to an RJ-45 port, hey, at least SPECTRE won't get to take over the world. We on the AtAT staff, in the meantime, will continue to use our AirPort network with impunity, secure in the knowledge that all an eavesdropper might learn about us is that we spend way too much time surfing IMDB and eBay.

(The staff of AtAT would like to apologize for the overtly male-centric, heterosexual bent of the underlying metaphor in the preceding scene, but hey, it's Bond's world-- we just live in it.)

SceneLink (2845)

And Now For A Word From Our Sponsors

As an Amazon Associate, AtAT earns from qualifying purchases

The above scene was taken from the 2/6/01 episode:

February 6, 2001: For you few remaining holdouts who still don't think new iMacs are due in Tokyo this month, we've got even more evidence to convince you. Meanwhile, a security flaw in the 802.11 protocol renders AirPort networks vulnerable to attack, and a small company in Canada is selling a new operating system with a familiar strategy and an even more familiar name...

Other scenes from that episode:

2844: "ALL SIGNS POINT TO YES" (2/6/01) As of right now, AtAT's complex and inscrutable probability analysis algorithms have proven conclusively that virtually all of the show's viewers are now expecting Apple to unveil new iMacs at Macworld Expo Tokyo in a couple of weeks...
2846: Now THIS One Is Blatant (2/6/01) Many of you disagree strongly with our feeling that Microsoft's upcoming "Windows XP" operating system isn't named specifically to cash in on Mac OS X's hype, and that's fine. Our therapist insists that we don't need your external validation to feel good about ourselves...

Or view the entire episode as originally broadcast...


	As an Amazon Associate, AtAT earns from qualifying purchases


	DISCLAIMER: AtAT was not a news site any more than Inside Edition was a "real" news show. We made Dawson's Creek look like 60 Minutes. We engaged in rampant guesswork, wild speculation, and pure fabrication for the entertainment of our viewers. Sure, everything here was "inspired by actual events," but so was Amityville II: The Possession. So lighten up. Site best viewed with a sense of humor. AtAT is not responsible for lost or stolen articles. Keep hands inside car at all times. The drinking of beverages while watching AtAT is strongly discouraged; AtAT is not responsible for damage, discomfort, or staining caused by spit-takes or "nosers." Everything you see here that isn't attributed to other parties is copyright ©,1997-2025 J. Miller and may not be reproduced or rebroadcast without his explicit consent (or possibly the express written consent of Major League Baseball, but we doubt it).