G4 Cars: The Future Is Now (3/12/01)
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Finally, Apple knows just what to do with all of those unsold Cubes moldering in dusty warehouses; a slew of them will be shot into space, and the rest are going into goofy-looking automobiles. Don't believe us? Then maybe you'll believe Macworld, who, as faithful viewer Robert Fernando pointed out, reports that Nissan has used Cubes in its Chappo, a "concept car" whose engendering concept was allegedly "a living room on wheels." Looking at the thing, however, we strongly suspect that the real concept behind it was "hey, let's make a car that looks kinda like one of those PlaySkool toys... and we can stick a COMPUTER in it!! (Dude, don't bogart that-- pass it this way...)"

The Chappo (evidently named after the legendary sixth Marx Brother) is currently on display at the Geneva Motor Show and boasts not one, but two G4 Cubes that power the vehicle's various domestic-style features-- features like "built-in entertainment, video-game controls, electronic monitoring, computer-adjustable seats, and more." This isn't just a car, folks; it's "an extension of the driver's 'social gathering space.'" As in, "Hey, everybody, what say we move this party out into the Chappo and really get things cookin'? We can play Quake 3 and watch Armageddon!"

Those of you who are drooling at the prospect of being able to play first-person shooters on a vehicularly-integrated Mac (Pathintosh, anyone?) while driving to work, cool your jets. According to the QuickTime video available about the Chappo (both 56K and T1 versions, each of which boasts "Infotainment Powered By Apple"), one Cube powers a nice, big 1024x768 screen for games, movies, and the like while the vehicle is stationary and in "living room" mode. The other runs a 640x480 display for the driver, which has "limited functionality, because of course you can't watch a DVD while you're driving." Waitaminnit, says who?! Sounds like someone just issued us a personal challenge!

Anyway, as we mentioned before, the Chappo is a "concept vehicle," which is industryspeak for "we only built one of these things, because no one would ever actually buy it." So Apple doesn't have a new outlet for Cubes after all-- at least, not until hordes of consumers demand that Nissan produce the Chappo as a mass-market product. Which ought to be happening any minute now...

 
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The above scene was taken from the 3/12/01 episode:

March 12, 2001: So that's the Cube's true calling: playing DVDs in "concept cars." Meanwhile, another teensy rumor about the Apple iPad keeps the flame of hope flickering for another week or two, and word has it that professional users may soon gain slots galore in the form of an Apple-branded expansion chassis dubbed "Thing 2"...

Other scenes from that episode:

  • 2917: Old PDA Rumors Never Die (3/12/01)   Ah, Mac OS Rumors; where would we be without you? For those of you who don't keep apace with the granddaddy of all Apple rumors sites, you should be aware that the dirt is getting shovelled fast and furious these days...

  • 2918: "Slot Jockeys Rejoice!" (3/12/01)   Ah, the age-old scuffle we lovingly refer to as "Slot Wars"; Apple ships fewer PCI slots to keep costs down and margins up, while a tiny but important (and very, very vocal) minority screams for more expansion room...

Or view the entire episode as originally broadcast...

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