It's now semi-officially official: there is an Apple retail store headed for Minneapolis, and it is destined to make its home in the glorious Mall of America. As faithful viewer John Gettler pointed out, a Mall spokesperson went blabbing to the PioneerPlanet, though details are practically nonexistent: "Apple Computer Inc. will be opening a retail store at the Mall of America" is pretty much all we get. And, of course, Apple is still refusing to comment on any and all rumors. (Given the mile-high mountain of evidence, we think the whole "Apple retail stores" thing has transcended the "rumor" classification; we'd call it a "trumor," but that sounds too much like "tumor." C'est la vie.)

While it's nice to get confirmation that Apple's Minneapolis boutique will indeed be in the Mall of America, we can't imagine that the company would have settled for anything less. These stores are as much about mind share as market share (more, even), and what better place to erect a monument to Apple's greatness than in the largest mall in the country? It's not a mall, it's the mall; show some respect. It's the Mecca of consumerism. Tourists from all over the world descend upon Minneapolis just to visit the Mall of America and bask in its holy neon glow. Legend has it that the fries at Corn Dogs Plus can restore sight, cure leprosy, and repair damaged credit ratings. Perhaps in keeping with that whole spirit, you can even get married there. The place is that cool.

The AtAT staff was lucky enough to make a pilgrimage to the Mall of America once a couple of years ago, and we can only say this: you haven't lived, capitalistically speaking, until you've visited a mall with four, count 'em, four Sunglass Huts. Oh, the excess! It was like we had died and gone to heaven-- or a reasonable consumer-grade facsimile thereof. Whatever your religious beliefs, you'll never convince us that heaven doesn't have at least two climate-controlled food courts, a fourteen-screen cinema, and a log ride.

So congrats to Apple for securing a spot in the Mall to End All Malls. Even if you ignore the quasi-religious aspect of the endeavor, we can't think of a better way to get Apple's name, logo, and butt-kicking products live and in-person in front of as many friendly eyeballs as possible. The Mall of America claims to get an average of 30 million visitors each year. That's 82,000 each and every single day-- and they're all in a shopping frame of mind. Oh, this is gonna be good.