Vital Signs Getting Weak (6/18/01)
SceneLink
 

We've heard it many times in the past, and from many different sources, but at this point our minds are pretty much made up: it's just about time to say sayonara to the Cube. That's a shame, of course, because Steve's eight-inch Mac in search of a market is so many things to so many people. Sleek? Yes. Gorgeous? That it is. A marvel of engineering and design? Absolutely. A sales disaster of Hindenburg-like proportions? Well, that might be stretching it a little, but generally speaking, that's not far off.

For what it's worth, the little birds tweeting around the AtAT compound told us months ago that Apple had completely ceased production of the Cube and was simply selling the scads of unsold models still left in the channel. Once those are gone, say those birdies, the Cube will vanish from Apple's product line so quickly that Fred Anderson will have to wonder if it was all a bad dream. Hopefully Apple won't take a completely revisionist attitude and try to pretend that the Cube never existed, as Redmond rightly tried to do with Microsoft Bob; after all, the Cube was an excellent Mac which won many awards, and Apple has nothing to be embarrassed about (other than some fairly pathetic sales figures).

For those of you who still haven't come to terms with the Cube's imminent demise, The Register summarizes the spate of recent reports that "Cubes are in very short supply pending the machine's removal from Apple's product line." That aligns pretty well with reports we've been receiving from the field-- that Cube supplies are finally drying up, and all available intelligence indicates that Apple isn't planning on restocking the shelves. While we pride ourselves on staying open-minded about the possibility of last-minute miracles of the Steve-ular sort, despite the fact that the Cube is Steve's own pride and joy, we think he's matured enough as a CEO to do what needs to be done.

So, two things: first, an early but fond farewell for a Mac more suited to a museum pedestal than a store shelf; and second, a reminder to Mac fans everywhere that if you want a Cube, don't wait too much longer, or you'll be out of luck. And remember, when (if?) it passes on, the Cube will still be with us, as Apple incorporates elements of its unique design into other products. (You have seen the new iBook, right?)

 
SceneLink (3121)
And Now For A Word From Our Sponsors
 

Mash-ups and original music by AtAT's former Intern and Goddess-in-Training

Prim M at YouTube
 

The above scene was taken from the 6/18/01 episode:

June 18, 2001: Numerous reports indicate that the Cube is finally on its last legs. Meanwhile, the Naked Mole Rat blesses us with a link while talking up the speed benefits of the Mac OS X "Puma" release, and MSNBC is caught rewriting a Wall Street Journal article to show Microsoft in a more favorable light...

Other scenes from that episode:

  • 3122: Fame! Glory! Faster Copies! (6/18/01)   Holy yikes, we've hit the big time! Sure, it was an honor to be chosen as a member of the elite MacAddict Network (now recently deceased). Yes, we were overwhelmed when Apple's iReview bestowed upon us a glowing five-star rating (before also vanishing into the ether; hmmm, do we sense a pattern?)...

  • 3123: And We'll Furnish The War (6/18/01)   Looking to take over the world using somewhat less-than-ethical means? Well, when shaping public opinion is key to your success, your own media outlet is an awfully convenient thing to have around. (Just ask William Randolph Hearst the next time you happen to be at a seance.)...

Or view the entire episode as originally broadcast...

Vote Early, Vote Often!
Why did you tune in to this '90s relic of a soap opera?
Nostalgia is the next best thing to feeling alive
My name is Rip Van Winkle and I just woke up; what did I miss?
I'm trying to pretend the last 20 years never happened
I mean, if it worked for Friends, why not?
I came here looking for a receptacle in which to place the cremated remains of my deceased Java applets (think about it)

(1287 votes)
Apple store at Amazon

As an Amazon Associate, AtAT earns from qualifying purchases

DISCLAIMER: AtAT was not a news site any more than Inside Edition was a "real" news show. We made Dawson's Creek look like 60 Minutes. We engaged in rampant guesswork, wild speculation, and pure fabrication for the entertainment of our viewers. Sure, everything here was "inspired by actual events," but so was Amityville II: The Possession. So lighten up.

Site best viewed with a sense of humor. AtAT is not responsible for lost or stolen articles. Keep hands inside car at all times. The drinking of beverages while watching AtAT is strongly discouraged; AtAT is not responsible for damage, discomfort, or staining caused by spit-takes or "nosers."

Everything you see here that isn't attributed to other parties is copyright ©,1997-2024 J. Miller and may not be reproduced or rebroadcast without his explicit consent (or possibly the express written consent of Major League Baseball, but we doubt it).