A Christmas miracle! It's a new year, and Michael Murdock, a 36-year-old Bay Area computer consultant with no previous CEO experience, is Apple's new Chief Executive Officer. After months of emailing and calling Steve Jobs and Larry Ellison offering to take the job, on a couple of days before Christmas he received email messages from both Larry and Steve asking him when he could start. The end-of-year CEO expectation has come after all!

...And if you believe that, you either had one too many "festive beverages" at your New Year's Eve party, or you're as naïve as this Murdock character apparently is. The San Francisco Chronicle reports the obvious-- that the job offer was just a practical joke (or rather, Steve 'n' Larry's frustrated sarcastic reaction to a guy who just wouldn't leave them alone). Of course, you have to wonder about the wisdom of sending even a joking response to someone whose repeated contact attempts border on stalking. When Murdock accepted the "job offer" and said that he would start on January 5th, Steve's reply was, "Please do not come to Apple. You will be asked to leave, and if you don't, you will be arrested."

Now, hang on, Steve... here's a guy who actually wants the job. That already makes him more qualified than any of the other "candidates." Plus, he's shown that he's gullible and trusting, so he may be the perfect "puppet CEO" with Steve 'n' Larry pulling the strings. Lastly, just because he has no experience is no reason to rule him out-- after all, it's not like the stock price could go much lower. We say, throw caution to the wind and give Murdock the job. How much worse could things really get?

(For the irony-impaired, no, we're not serious. Mostly.)