Nine Say Yea, Nine Say Nay (11/6/01)

Sometimes we really love living in Massachusetts. Sure, the taxes may be on the high side, but at least our money gets us an attorney general that won't roll over and play dead like a certain Bush-administration Justice Department we could mention. Whereas the feds are looking to end the three-year run of "Redmond Justice" not with a bang, but a whimper of a settlement so full of loopholes you'd think it was a breakfast cereal, not all of the eighteen states involved with the case are willing to roll with that particular punch.

The states had until today to decide whether or not to sign on with the proposed settlement, and according to a CNET article, fully half of them have refused to cave that easily. Massachusetts Attorney General Tom Reilly has been saying for days that he wouldn't sign, and stuck to his guns; he and the attorneys general of eight other states have therefore managed to split "Redmond Justice" into two shows. The "classic" story will continue with settlement hearings, as the feds and half the states feverishly try to get the heck out of Dodge; meanwhile, an as-yet-unnamed "Redmond Justice" spinoff will follow the continuing litigation as nine states push for a resolution that actually, you know, accomplishes something. It's antitrust fun for the whole family!

Funnily enough, an Associated Press article describes Microsoft attorney John Warden as "frustrated" that half the states are pushing forward and quotes him as saying, "The issues in this case have been beaten to death and they have been beaten to death by people who are worn out." Awwww... Is widdle John-John all tuckered out? Since Microsoft's strategy all along has been to stall until the issues become moot and the government changes hands, maybe the company should have hired a lawyer with a little more stamina. Suck it up, John, because it ain't over yet. You're in this for the long haul.

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From the writer/creator of AtAT, a Pandemic Dad Joke taken WAYYYYYY too far


The above scene was taken from the 11/6/01 episode:

November 6, 2001: Apple gets sued again-- this time for racial discrimination. Meanwhile, reports of prototype Power Mac G5s have the Mac community all a-drool, and half of the states refuse to sign the "Redmond Justice" settlement agreement, thus resulting in the launch of a spin-off show...

Other scenes from that episode:

  • 3376: The Apple Lawsuit Du Jour (11/6/01)   Another day, another lawsuit filed against Apple. At this rate, pretty soon the company's lawyers are going to outnumber its engineers-- a development that may herald extreme changes to the landscape of Apple's entire intramural bowling league...

  • 3377: Hey, Wake Us In January (11/6/01)   Still reeling from the idea that there are a couple of 2.4 GHz G5 processors floating around out there in Cupertino? Well, come back down to earth, buddy, because even when Apple finally gets Power Mac G5s rolling off the lines, they sure as Steve aren't going to ship at clock speeds even close to that range...

Or view the entire episode as originally broadcast...

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