Last and almost certainly least on our Halloween line-up of frightful fun, what could be scarier than the security flaws overflowing in pretty much any Microsoft product release? Answer: one of those products being "certified as secure" by the government. As faithful viewer breH pointed out, a Reuters article notes that, after three years and "many millions of dollars," Windows 2000 has received the Common Criteria certification-- "the highest level of security evaluation of any commercial operating system." ("Windows" and "highest level of security" both being used in the same context? Hey, funny stuff-- these guys should write for Leno!)

Still trying to wrap your head around how a Microsoft operating system managed to get certified as the most secure OS available? Well, this might make the whole thing a little easier to digest: it didn't. Despite Microsoft's marketingspeak, according to Gartner analyst John Pescatore, the Common Criteria certification process "isn't testing for flaws," but rather for "whether we can believe the claims the operating system is making for the security functions it provides." Or, to put it another way (as, indeed, Alan Paller of the System Administration, Networking and Security Institute did), "it doesn't mean anything for the users... they still deliver the software misconfigured and with flaws."

So don't worry, the sky isn't falling; apparently Windows isn't any more secure now than it was before getting the certification. What it does mean is that Microsoft now gets to sell Windows 2000 to government agencies without having to pass any extra security testing or needing to get waivers from the NSA-- which means that the U.S. government might end up even more Windows-centric than it already is. And that, ladles and gentlemints, is the spooky sort of Halloween thought that should keep you awake in bed tonight. AaaawwwOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!