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Imminent Feline Shortage (7/24/03)
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Holy cats-- and boy, do we mean it! You know how Apple has seen fit to code-name its various releases of Mac OS X after assorted species of large cats? For example, right now everyone's salivating over Panther, which will be 10.3, and the current release is Jaguar (10.2). And before Steve embraced this wacky scheme to turn internal code names into marketing campaigns that lend themselves to the overuse of faux fur Xs, 10.1 was known internally as Puma and 10.0 was Cheetah. (We're not sure if the Public Beta had a cat-themed code name; is there a big cat that's really slow, panics a lot, and has virtually no application support?)
Well, we hope you're not a hardcore dog person, because apparently the cat thing isn't going away anytime soon. The eagle-eyed sleuths over at MacRumors just noticed that Apple filed for a handful of new trademarks a few weeks ago-- including Cougar, Tiger, Leopard, and Lynx. (Isn't that a law firm?) If you're the incurably skeptical type, you can see for yourself by searching for "apple" over at the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office. All four are categorized for use for "computers; computer software; computer operating system software," so all that remains is figuring out which feline corresponds to which OS release, and buying new drapes to match.
Viewers skilled in the esoteric practice known as "counting" may have noticed that Apple's four new trademarks only carry the company through Mac OS X 10.7; who knew that Apple's biggest marketing predicament in the 21st century would turn out to be running out of big cats? There's still "Ocelot," of course, and "Lion" (although that one seems a little too obvious even for Apple), but beyond that, Apple may eventually have to settle for naming its operating systems after somewhat smaller beasts. The good news is, there are hundreds of smaller cats from which Apple may choose; the bad news is, people may be slightly less excited about buying an operating system named "Pig-Faced Persian," "British Tick," or "Munchkin Polydactyl."
By the way, this breeds list contains what may well be one of the greatest and most profound quotes of all time: "Attempts to breed hairless tailless cats have not been generally welcomed." Learn it, live it, put it on a bumper sticker.
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SceneLink (4096)
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And Now For A Word From Our Sponsors |
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 | | The above scene was taken from the 7/24/03 episode: July 24, 2003: Apple lines up four more big cats for future Mac OS X releases, but what happens when they run out? Meanwhile, IBM risks the Wrath of Steve by backing a company trying to be the "next-generation Pixar," and there's finally an iPod competitor that might actually be a viable alternative-- too bad it's even more expensive...
Other scenes from that episode: 4097: 2,314 Of 'Em Named "Jim" (7/24/03) You just gotta love the schizoid relationships between big companies, especially in high tech. Take Apple and Microsoft, for example: bitter enemies when it comes to Mac OS vs. Windows or QuickTime vs. Windows Media, right?... 4098: "Good Enough" ISN'T Cheap (7/24/03) Speaking of "undisputed kings," few people are going to deny that the iPod owns that title in the portable digital music space. It's the player that everybody wants, and (if "they" are correct, since we've often heard "them" say that the iPod recently captured 50% market share, though we've yet to find any numbers to back that up) it's the one that half the shoppers actually buy; as for its Deadly Sin Ratio, it inspires lust, envy, pride, and possibly gluttony among people who get just a little too taken by its utter scrumptiousness...
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