All right, who's all fired up for Macworld Expo Boston? It's gonna be "mad" or "phat" or "groovy" or whatever the kids are calling it these days. After all, it's the show's triumphant return to its roots! Can we get a rousing hands-in "Whoa Beantown?" C'mon, let us hear ya shake the roof!

No?

Sheesh, tough room. Seriously, folks, don't be like that; we know that Apple has chosen not to attend and a Macworld Expo without Apple is sort of like a hot dog without "'meat' derived by advanced Meat Bone Separation and Meat Recovery Systems," but really, we can still have plenty of fun without Apple there, right? Okay, so there won't be a Stevenote, and yes, that's a tragedy to those of us who were looking forward to a live infusion of Reality Distortion Field energy (it's been clinically linked with clearer sinuses and whiter teeth, you know), but there are going to be plenty of other exhibitors there that'll make you forget all about Apple's whole "We Hate Boston So We're Keeping Our Ball And Staying Home, Boo Hoo Hoo" routine. Check it out: MacCentral has the goods on a "first look" at some of the companies that'll soon have you asking "Apple who?"

Just look at that lineup! Quark! Yes, Quark will be there, "headlining the event" alongside... Xerox! And Harman Multimedia! Talk about your Triad of Expo Oomph, right? Honestly, why would you want to drool over the same tired old Apple booth packed full of new Macs and iPods when you can instead evaluate publishing software to run on them, printers to plug into them, and speakers to play them through? This is a golden opportunity, folks.

And look at everyone else that's coming: Brenthaven, Hash Inc., Roku, Software MacKiev, Unitek... why, the list just goes on and on. Sure, there may be one or two big names missing from that line-up-- like, say, Adobe, or Microsoft, or Macromedia-- but what do any of them make that's so dadgummed special to the platform?

Oh, and before you say anything, we just have to mention that it'd be pretty darn cynical of you to point out that MacCentral is the "News Service" of Macworld which is owned by IDG which also owns IDG World Expo which is the company putting on this show in the first place. Implying that MacCentral might be trying to talk up the viability of a sagging conference just because it's owned by the same entity as the show's organizers? For shame! Why, that's like implying that we're cheerleading for a less-than-compelling event just because it moved about ten miles away from us and saved us a zillion dollars in travel expenses. Ooooh, the effrontery of it all! Besides, we're not even sure if we're going-- so there!

Um.

Well, you know, it's just that... without Apple or Adobe there, it's going to be a little tough to justify the subway fare. Don't look at us like that-- they raised the rates recently, you know, and now it's like a buck and quarter. Each way. And that doesn't even include the bus down to the train station. Maybe if we needed a PowerBook bag or something, but the ones we've got are actually still holding up pretty well. Don't get us wrong, we'll try to make it and everything, but we're pretty busy these days. With... stuff.

Whatever. Registration is open now; operators are standing by!