Your attention, please! If the psychiatrist of a Mr. Michael Eisner is in the audience, please be advised: it's time to up the dosage. The man makes public appearances while dangerously unbalanced, and says things that can only indicate a complete and utter schism with reality. As for the cause of this frightening behavior, we aren't mental health care professionals, so we can only speculate; maybe it's got something to do with the stress of finally accepting the fact that a lot of people hate him and think he's incompetent. Who knows? That's your job, not ours. All we know is, the guy's talking like a crazy person.

Get this: faithful viewer Boesterama pointed out a Reuters article in which the Disney CEO is clearly mired way down there in the depths of denial. When speaking about the failed Pixar negotiations which will deprive Disney of potentially billions of dollars of revenue, Eisner claims that there's "still a chance for a new film distribution deal." While he fully acknowledges that talks between the two companies haven't reopened (so we suppose he's not completely out of touch yet), quoth the psycho, "I will not believe it is over until it is over... I am just an eternal optimist."

Now, nuts he may be, but technically he's right about the game not actually being over; Pixar's contract doesn't expire until the end of next year, and as we mentioned last week, Steve hasn't exactly been pushing the whole "finding a replacement" thing. On top of that, a couple of months ago reports started to surface that Steve's only real objection to working with Disney is Eisner himself, and that he'd absolutely reconsider a new deal with the House o' Mouse if Eisner quits or gets hauled out on his kiester. So yeah, Mikey's correct: it isn't over until it's over-- but it won't be not over until it's all over. Or something.

In other words, if Eisner would finally learn to take a freakin' hint already (you know, like a 45% vote of no confidence from the shareholders, a 72.5% vote of no confidence from his own company's 401(k) plan participants, Walt's own nephew calling him a loser, Steve Jobs spitting in his milk at the lunch table, etc.) and trade in his CEOship for something more his speed-- say, making colorful lanyards to sell table-to-table at the local Wendy's-- then Disney and Pixar could have the storybook happy ending that always used to work so well in the Magic Kingdom.

Not that we expect that ever to happen, mind you; Eisner has made it abundantly clear that he's not budging until a half-dozen no-necks show up with crowbars and tire irons... and if the board of directors is so completely in Eisner's front pocket (along with an N*SYNC keychain, a half-dozen warm Gummi Bears, and a really cool nickel he flattened on the train tracks last week) that it didn't can him after that last shareholders meeting, it won't send in the goon squad until he runs amuck with a chainsaw and neglects to apologize for all the death and mayhem.

Which means this whole situation is hurtling toward tragedy. Quick! Fetch the straitjacket, before it's too late!