Hey, everybody, it's "Pathetic Excuse For a Segue Day" here at AtAT! So, uh, in the same general vein of Apple France's "wrongful refusal" lawsuit for not licensing FairPlay to Virgin (which potentially falls under the general category of "freaky foreign laws"), wouldja believe that iPods are all but illegal in Australia? Well, okay, not really-- but using one pretty much is. A few days ago we stumbled upon an article in the Sydney Morning Herald that pointed out the irony of an Australian Apple magazine ad which "demonstrates how to copy songs from a CD onto a computer and then from the computer onto an iPod," but which also includes Apple's standard small-print plea to its customers: "Don't steal music."

So where's the irony? Right here, Sparky: in Australia, apparently copying music from a CD you've legally purchased, even just to listen to it on your own personal iPod, is stealing music. That's right, Australian copyright law has no "fair use" provision like we've got here in the States. So the next time you're fuming about the Digital Millennium Copyright Act (as well you should, actually), you can take a little solace in the fact that at least no one's calling the feds because you transferred your own purchased CDs to your iPod. (Yet.)

To be fair, no one's calling the feds in Oz, either; iPod sales are brisk, and reportedly much of the population is blissfully unaware that the simple act of ripping their purchased CDs for use on an iPod makes them a pack of dirty, stinkin' criminals. A spokesperson for the police admits that "it's unlikely that the Australian Federated Police would investigate individuals for offences such as illegally copying a CD." Nevertheless, a copyright expert at Melbourne University maintains that there's technically "not much you can do legally with an Apple iPod in Australia" until the iTunes Music Store makes it down there except for "use it to listen to music that you've recorded yourself or even to a recording made by your friend's band. But that's about it."

Nonsense, we say! What about Solitaire?

Of course, if you're the pessimistic sort and you doubt that tens of thousands of Australian iPod owners shelled out hundreds of dollars apiece for a portable Solitaire game, then, well, you're assuming that just about everyone with an iPod from Perth to Brisbane is breaking the law-- and we're not sure it's wise to make broad generalizations about a whole nationality of people like that. It's rude and narrow-minded, and what's more, those guys are all descended from convicts, so if you get them mad they'll likely come over and crush your skull.

Ha! Just a joke, Aussies! We love convicts.

JOKE! Another joke. Honestly, we're all about Australia over here. Jack even lived in Melbourne for a few years as a kid and barracks for Collingwood. So in closing we'll just say three things: 1) Just kidding; 2) Go Magpies!; and 3) please don't kill us.