Fear not, true believers; there are still more rumor scraps to sustain those of you who, like us, still keep a candle lit in the window for an Apple-branded Palm device. Recently the naysayers have been had their own rumorlicious ammo-- namely, the still-under-wraps Palm IIIc, Palm's first foray into the world of color PDAs. The IIIc's existence has been a public secret for months now, and a February introduction is still expected; in fact, the device has reportedly already materialized in the byzantine inventory systems of CompUSA. Many have taken that to mean that the mysterious color device to be unveiled at Palm's imminent Palm Color Device Developer Connection is none other than the IIIc itself, despite Palm's own maddeningly ambiguous claim that it's the baby of "one of the hardware manufacturers that makes products based on the Palm OS." Yeah, Palm is indeed one of those manufacturers, but the phraseology is darned wacky if that's really what they meant.

So, just for the sake of screwball speculation, let's take Palm's statement at face value and assume for the moment that the color Palm OS device making its debut at this developer shindig is not the IIIc. Then what? A new Visor? Not likely, given how Handspring spends all its time doing backflips trying to fulfill demand for the current model. Sony, or one of the other known Palm OS licensees? More plausible, to be sure-- especially since Palm only finally broke down and added color support to the Palm OS because of Sony's insistence, but where's the drama in that? Nope, our money's still on the dark horse: Apple. These Apple-Palm rumors have been too numerous to ignore, and that little comment Steve Jobs made about Palm during his keynote ("We've been doing a lot of work with these guys lately" or words to that effect) only strengthens our suspicions.

And here's where the pipe-dream-sustaining rumor comes in: a rumor-monger of no lesser stature than Mac the Knife himself (well, okay, it's actually his intern Brett) has the goods. He claims that sources from all sides are proclaiming this week's Apple's Demo Days to be the "possible" launch date for an Apple-branded Palm OS unit-- the very first of its ilk to support color. Okay, sure, the Knife's been wrong before, but despite his predilection for drug-induced obscurity, he's had more than his share of accurate predictions. Plus, with his impressive pharmaceutical history, we bet he knows a thing or two about seeing colors. Inside info or drug-addled hallucination? We'll know in a week or two.

Speaking of portable Apple gear most of us expected to see long ago at a keynote far, far away-- just where the heck is Pismo? Prognosticators trying to forecast a revised intro date for Apple's long-overdue (well, as overdue as any unannounced product without an official ship date can be) PowerBook revision have spat out dates wildly ranging anywhere from this week through May-- of 2006. But hold on to your hats, because convergence is now upon us. Multiple sources are now saying that Pismo's just around the corner.

For instance, Mac the Knife throws in his two cents, claiming that Pismo's gone "golden master" and once Mac OS 9.0.1 is ready to roll, the new PowerBooks should be ready for a Macworld Expo Tokyo introduction in a couple of weeks. Okay, yeah, we know-- Apple pretty much never unveils a major new product at an overseas event, but hey, Uncle Steve is always full of surprises, so we figure anything's possible. Then there's Go2Mac, formerly O'Grady's PowerPage, who predicts a Pismo debut a week earlier; according to them, "the second week of February" is the magic time frame. And Mac OS Rumors essentially concurs with both of them, claiming there's "at least two weeks left before Apple is ready to ship Pismo." All told, we're looking at sometime before the end of February, apparently.

As for our own prediction, we claim that Pismo was in fact announced a month ago during the San Francisco Expo keynote, but for reasons known only to the Powers That Be, Phil Schiller did the honors backstage without a microphone during Steve's Mac OS X demo; consequently, no one noticed. Our only explanation for such a bizarre move is an intricate conspiracy with a myriad of interlocking complexities, including governmental graft, spy satellite tracking technology, genetically-altered tobacco crops, and a surprise bid for the 2000 Presidential election. We'll let you work out the details for yourselves.

If you aren't part of the solution, you're part of the problem. If you ain't fer us, yer agin' us. Shirts against skins. All that fun polarizing stuff. Yes, that's right, "Redmond Justice" is coming right down to the wire, so now more than ever it's time to pick a side. Forget the Super Bowl-- that is so last Sunday. C'mon, who are you rooting for, Microsoft or the government? Anyone got an office pool going?

Yes, with final oral arguments scheduled for February 22nd and settlement talks apparently still not bearing fruit, everyone's getting Big Game fever-- or "Big Case fever" would probably be more accurate. Faithful viewer and Microsoft watchdog Jerry O'Neil notes that everyone's choosing up sides as the case winds to a close. According to The New York Times, Microsoft's friends and foes alike are filing briefs in shows of support for one side or the other. The "Association for Competitive Technology"? For Microsoft. Big surprise there, given that the group was only founded as a reaction to the case itself. The Software and Information Industry Association (formerly the Software Publishers Association), on the other hand? Apparently against Microsoft-- even though Microsoft is itself a member. The SIIA's rumored brief supporting the government reminds us of the scene in Evil Dead 2 when Ash's hand gets possessed and starts breaking dishes over his own head.

As the days march on and the gallows looms on the horizon, we expect to see lots more vocal support for both sides from various government representatives and industry bigwigs. Now we're just waiting for the frenzy to reach a fever pitch. What do you suppose Dick Schmalensee (SCHMALENSEE!!) would look like with one of those big foam hands and the Windows logo painted on his face? Will David Boies don a rainbow wig and hold up a sign that says "John 3:16"? Stay tuned and find out...