Mac owners will totally understand what we mean when we talk about the Excuse to Buy™. The Excuse to Buy is what one tries to concoct when rational justification of the expense of buying a new Mac simply isn't going to happen. For instance, say you've got a beige Power Mac G3 and you're drooling uncontrollably at the thought of getting one of the new "icebox" models. From a logical cost-benefit perspective, there's just no way you can make it stick-- you'd gain extra speed, but how much speed is really necessary to check your email and play StarCraft? Certainly no more than your existing beige box already delivers. And you have no use for FireWire, but you want it anyway because it sounds cool-- even though you've got a slew of SCSI peripherals and you'd have to spring for a SCSI card to keep using them. Basically, you're slavering over the cool blue and white easy-open case, the big "G3" on the side, and "FireWire" because it's fun to say, particularly in a "Great Cornholio" voice. But if you actually go and blow the kids' college fund on a new G3 (especially since you're just now rebuilding that fund after you blew it last year on your beige G3), your spouse will be on the lam and wanted for justifiable homicide and you'll get to answer the age-old question of whether or not there are Macs in the afterlife.

And that's where the Excuse to Buy enters the picture. Isn't it kind of Apple to help us justify our unnecessary outlays of vast quantities of cash better spent elsewhere? Take, for example, Apple's brand new G3 promotion: anyone who purchases a new Power Mac G3 before June 27th gets to choose between a free internal 56K modem or a free internal Zip drive. That's exactly the hook you need to make that new G3 seem like a reasonable purchase-- after all, it's like saving over a hundred bucks, and it's a limited-time offer! You'd better pick one up now, because otherwise you might forget and miss the deadline. After all, you've got that tax refund coming in any day now, right?

If a free Zip drive or modem isn't enough to rationalize your purchase, consider throwing in an extra $500 to get a matching Apple 17" Studio Display; Apple's now offering a $100 rebate if you buy one with your new G3. That means you'd be saving well over $200 on your total purchase, and you'd have a matching Mac and monitor, which, as everyone knows, is absolutely key to being a productive member of society. C'mon, those kids of yours probably won't even want to go to college-- who are you to force them into a life they'd resent? And if you can't run faster than your spouse, just make sure you've got a decent head start...