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Straight And Sorry (10/17/99)
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Well, it's official: Apple has in fact reinstated all those pre-October 13th G4 orders that it had originally cancelled. In fact, it's not just official, it's officially official-- instead of simply contacting the affected customers, Apple's issued an honest-to-goodness public press release announcing the decision's reversal, admitting the screw-up, and apologizing for what some might call a "regrettable error in judgment" and others might call "one seriously boneheaded move." And while it may seem out of place for a man with an ego the size of Montana to admit to a mistake and apologize in public, that's just what Steve Jobs has done. The man is pure class.
"We clearly dropped the ball in this instance," says Steve. "We apologize to our customers for upsetting and disappointing them during this past week. Our actions today will hopefully set things right." Aww, that's okay, Steve-- we could never stay mad at you. But we're just a little concerned for your welfare. Cancelling existing orders and forcing customers to re-order at higher prices? There's only one thing that could make that sound like a good idea: some seriously bad drugs. So we're glad to see that you've come down off the brown acid and appear to have suffered no long-term ill effects, but stay clean this time, okay? It's the '90s, man.
Then again, we're starting to wonder how crazy the whole idea was in the first place. As Steve himself puts it, "Good companies make mistakes. Great companies fix them." So there you have it; this whole spiel was simply Steve making Apple a good company by alienating the entire customer base, and then making it a great company by asking for forgiveness. In this manner, Apple achieved greatness in a matter of five short days, all thanks to Steve Jobs' Subtle Plan™. Now that's Thinking Different. Ly. Whatever.
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And Now For A Word From Our Sponsors |
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 | | The above scene was taken from the 10/17/99 episode: October 17, 1999: Steve puts on his Humble Hat and apologizes publicly to the masses. Meanwhile, Apple's lab gnomes continue to tinker with the next PowerBook, whose battery life may soon be longer than the average Road Rules marathon, and Microsoft sends in the political muscle to reduce the Justice Department's antitrust funding...
Other scenes from that episode: 1849: 20 Episodes of "Alice" (10/17/99) Okay, now that we've got cool new iMacs on the shelves, iBooks trickling into the channel (albeit at the rate of a tranquilized sloth), and the brand-new Power Mac G4 ("Now even slower for your safety!"), it's time for Apple to focus on updating the fourth quadrant of its Amazing Grid O' Products... 1850: Shame Is For The Poor (10/17/99) Rule 6 in the Bill Gates Guide To World Domination: If you can't beat 'em, cut their funding. The latest gigglefest in the ongoing "Redmond Justice" struggle first came to our attention on Friday, when faithful viewer Todd Wheeler pointed out a Washington Post article about Microsoft's latest strategy to free themselves from their sticky Department of Justice woes...
Or view the entire episode as originally broadcast... | |  |
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