What's Past Is Prelude (2/6/00)
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It's scoop time! Everyone on earth is waiting for Pismo, the next PowerBook. Plenty of folks are expecting an iBook revision, too, expecting a Graphite model with DVD. And more than a few are still holding out hope that faster and/or multiprocessor Power Mac G4 systems are just around the corner. The details of all of those product updates may or may not be true, but we can tell you this much: the next iMac is coming much sooner than you'd think. And contrary to popular rumor, the next model does not boast a seventeen-inch screen.

Don't get us wrong-- the 17" iMac is definitely in development, and will surface soon enough. But before then, the next big thing in iMacs is small. While developing the 17" iMac, the folks at Apple were struck by how much larger and heavier the iMac's rounded Graphite case had to become. Since a small footprint was such an integral part of the original spirit of the iMac, Apple's decided to move in the other direction. Therefore, the next iMac will have a paradigm-breaking nine-inch screen. Also, to make better use of desk space, this new unit (code-named "OUTATIME") has a square base, and ditches the iMac's traditional rounded curves for space-efficient right angles. Jobs deemed the entirely clear plastics a bit too drab, and reinstated the older rainbow Apple logo as a splash of color-- the rainbow against a field of grey, like in the original "Think Different" ads. Oh, and the CD/DVD-ROM drive has been replaced with a single 3.5" floppy drive, since it's a writeable device and therefore can be used for quick and easy local file backups-- something that no previous iMac could do right out of the box. Want to see a picture? Check it now, because it may not be up for long, given the tenacity of Apple's lawyers.

All right, all right-- so it's really just a clear Mac SE. So sue us. But when we saw its transparent, all-in-one design hearkening all the way back from 1987, we couldn't help but see the iMac's roots. Apparently fewer than ten of these clear-plastic "test" SEs were ever made, and we imagine they number among the most valuable and sought-after Apple collectors' items. Most interesting of all, though, is how modern and futuristic the SE still looks after all these years. There's still something to be said for the "toaster" Macs; their design really is timeless. Just give 'em a see-through shell, and they look like Internet appliances that won't surface until next year at the earliest. The rest of the industry's still playing design catch-up.

 
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And Now For A Word From Our Sponsors
 

From the writer/creator of AtAT, a Pandemic Dad Joke taken WAYYYYYY too far

 

The above scene was taken from the 2/6/00 episode:

February 6, 2000: Just itching to take apart your iBook without voiding your warranty? Maybe the new AppleCare Technician Training program is for you. Meanwhile, a loose-lipped aide spills about Jeb Bush's mysterious visit to Apple recently, and the next iMac isn't bigger-- it's smaller...

Other scenes from that episode:

  • 2077: We Should Be Certified (2/6/00)   When Apple announced that the new iMacs had an easy-access door that made RAM upgrades a simple and painless procedure, did you roll your eyes heavenward and wonder what all the fuss was about? Were you the one who once gleefully flipped your Bondi Blue iMac face-down and surgically removed its polycarbonate shell without so much as a tinge of anxiety?...

  • 2078: Goon Squad Calling (2/6/00)   Apparently Apple's highly-paid team of coverup artists are slipping a bit these days; perhaps the excitement over the Lone Gunmen getting their own spin-off has thrown them off their game or something...

Or view the entire episode as originally broadcast...

Vote Early, Vote Often!
Why did you tune in to this '90s relic of a soap opera?
Nostalgia is the next best thing to feeling alive
My name is Rip Van Winkle and I just woke up; what did I miss?
I'm trying to pretend the last 20 years never happened
I mean, if it worked for Friends, why not?
I came here looking for a receptacle in which to place the cremated remains of my deceased Java applets (think about it)

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