Did Someone Say "Pet Rock"? (9/8/00)
SceneLink
 

Speaking of Mac OS Rumors, while the site has certainly "relaxed" its posting frequency lately, the new stuff that's up there is far too good to pass up. Buried under four feet of disclaimers about how apocryphal this information is, the site goes on to paint a fascinating picture of your friend and ours, the long-rumored and very tardy Apple handheld. That's right; if you thought the Apple PDA rumors were dead and buried, then MOSR just grabbed a shovel and dug 'em up again. And we are positively thrilled that our pet phantom Apple product has made an unexpected reappearance, moldy though it may be.

If you believe MOSR, "nearly a hundred independent sightings" over the course of the past month describe a device "about the same size as a Palm V" with an "uncolored translucent plastic enclosure," a "small, thick antenna" running up one side, and a "small color screen." Assuming this thing exists, we'd have to assume that it's not a Palm derivative, since there's "no apparent stylus or other input device." Input? Who needs input? This rumor corroborates several reports from our own sources that Steve's really burnt out on the whole "input" thing, and has since mandated a far more "Zen" direction: output-only Macs, with no mouse or keyboard. Why not a Zen handheld, too?

But let's wander farther into the Land of Diminishing Credibility, shall we? The most intriguing thing about this alleged Apple handheld is that it's wirelessly tethered to a "master" Mac via AirPort. That's right; get out of AirPort's range and the Apple handheld becomes truly Zen, i.e. a small translucent paperweight. Reportedly the AirPort connection isn't for the synchronization of data, but actually required for the operation of the handheld at all. So if you're in the market for a PDA that only works within 150 feet of your desktop Mac, it sounds like you're in luck!

Others may be wondering why anyone would buy a handheld that can't be used more than "a short distance away from at least one Mac that is AirPort-capable." Shame on you! You lack vision. Why, MOSR itself states that "the possibilities are fascinating," and we have to agree. Why, you could use one to... er... hmm. Or maybe... Huh. Well, trust us-- the possibilities are fascinating, and we'll prove it just as soon as we can think of one.

 
SceneLink (2536)
And Now For A Word From Our Sponsors
 

Mash-ups and original music by AtAT's former Intern and Goddess-in-Training

Prim M at YouTube
 

The above scene was taken from the 9/8/00 episode:

September 8, 2000: Everyone wants to know what happened to Mac OS Rumors, and we've got some answers. Meanwhile, rumors of an AirPort-dependent Apple handheld leave people scratching their heads in confusion, and a bevy of iMacs die a horrible, senseless death in Florida...

Other scenes from that episode:

  • 2535: No Ninjas, Just A Cut-Off (9/8/00)   Wow, not since people grossly misinterpreted last June's infamous "AtAT is now a wholly-owned subsidiary of MSN" satire have we endured such an avalanche of mail; the next day we had to issue a "just a joke, folks!" explanation just to keep our mail server from exploding, but this time around the mailbombing isn't even our fault...

  • 2537: More Senseless Violence (9/8/00)   Well, it's never nice to start off a weekend on a down note, but sometimes life kicks you in the head-- or, if you happen to be an iMac, in the screen. You've probably all seen representations of graphic violence before-- photos of animal testing, people chewing glass on Guinness World Records, those "real crash footage" films from driver's ed class-- but nothing will prepare you for the carnage that faithful viewer Dan Catalano stumbled across...

Or view the entire episode as originally broadcast...

Vote Early, Vote Often!
Why did you tune in to this '90s relic of a soap opera?
Nostalgia is the next best thing to feeling alive
My name is Rip Van Winkle and I just woke up; what did I miss?
I'm trying to pretend the last 20 years never happened
I mean, if it worked for Friends, why not?
I came here looking for a receptacle in which to place the cremated remains of my deceased Java applets (think about it)

(1287 votes)
Apple store at Amazon

As an Amazon Associate, AtAT earns from qualifying purchases

DISCLAIMER: AtAT was not a news site any more than Inside Edition was a "real" news show. We made Dawson's Creek look like 60 Minutes. We engaged in rampant guesswork, wild speculation, and pure fabrication for the entertainment of our viewers. Sure, everything here was "inspired by actual events," but so was Amityville II: The Possession. So lighten up.

Site best viewed with a sense of humor. AtAT is not responsible for lost or stolen articles. Keep hands inside car at all times. The drinking of beverages while watching AtAT is strongly discouraged; AtAT is not responsible for damage, discomfort, or staining caused by spit-takes or "nosers."

Everything you see here that isn't attributed to other parties is copyright ©,1997-2024 J. Miller and may not be reproduced or rebroadcast without his explicit consent (or possibly the express written consent of Major League Baseball, but we doubt it).