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More Senseless Violence (9/8/00)
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Well, it's never nice to start off a weekend on a down note, but sometimes life kicks you in the head-- or, if you happen to be an iMac, in the screen. You've probably all seen representations of graphic violence before-- photos of animal testing, people chewing glass on Guinness World Records, those "real crash footage" films from driver's ed class-- but nothing will prepare you for the carnage that faithful viewer Dan Catalano stumbled across in the St. Petersburg Times. It seems that vandals went on a rampage at Sand Pine Elementary School, wrecking some $100,000 worth of equipment... including several poor, defenseless iMacs. Warning: the photo is not for the weak of heart.
The local school district is offering a $1000 reward "for information leading to the arrest of the perpetrators." Well, that's all well and good, but frankly, we're surprised Steve Jobs hasn't publicly announced a million-dollar reward for anyone who brings him the vandals' heads on sticks. Well, okay... maybe not a million. That amount's more suited to the guy pumping an iMac full of lead to turn an Epinions commercial into an iMac snuff film. But at least a hundred large for the vandals, right? Surely someone with Steve's money and influence can see to it that these criminals are "punished"-- in the big, scary, vigilante sense of the word.
Dan has his own ideas about what happened, though: "the perpetrators were described as 'a couple of shaggy-haired, bespectacled young men' who left behind graffiti reading 'Billy G. & Mikey D. rule the computer pool!'" Oh, what confused, twisted individuals this sick society is capable of churning out. We weep for the death of the spirit and the soul...
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And Now For A Word From Our Sponsors |
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 | | The above scene was taken from the 9/8/00 episode: September 8, 2000: Everyone wants to know what happened to Mac OS Rumors, and we've got some answers. Meanwhile, rumors of an AirPort-dependent Apple handheld leave people scratching their heads in confusion, and a bevy of iMacs die a horrible, senseless death in Florida...
Other scenes from that episode: 2535: No Ninjas, Just A Cut-Off (9/8/00) Wow, not since people grossly misinterpreted last June's infamous "AtAT is now a wholly-owned subsidiary of MSN" satire have we endured such an avalanche of mail; the next day we had to issue a "just a joke, folks!" explanation just to keep our mail server from exploding, but this time around the mailbombing isn't even our fault... 2536: Did Someone Say "Pet Rock"? (9/8/00) Speaking of Mac OS Rumors, while the site has certainly "relaxed" its posting frequency lately, the new stuff that's up there is far too good to pass up. Buried under four feet of disclaimers about how apocryphal this information is, the site goes on to paint a fascinating picture of your friend and ours, the long-rumored and very tardy Apple handheld...
Or view the entire episode as originally broadcast... | |  |
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