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Steve's Bag FULL Of Toys (12/21/00)
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If the pessimistic prospect of a Power Mac G4/533 leaves a nasty taste in your mouth, why not sample a bit of unbridled optimism? Remember, Steve loves surprises, and the odds of him walking out on that stage and not unleashing a horde of impressive new gear are pretty darn slim. C'mon, he'd never do that! "But AtAT," some of you are saying, "what about the Expo last January? We didn't get any new toys then-- not even the Pismo PowerBook that everyone was expecting." Well, that's a very good point. Which is why we're now going to change the subject abruptly and without explanation.
Anyway, as we were saying, Steve loves to surprise us and shower us with goodies. In addition to faster Power Macs, most people think he'll take the wraps off of the PowerBook G4. And while it'd be an unusual move, is there any real reason why he couldn't upgrade Apple's entire product line? Just think of it: new iMacs, iBooks, and even new Cubes could comprise a dazzling array of bright, shiny objects intended to divert attention away from the lurking specter of Apple's first quarterly loss in three years. Hey, it could happen.
What's that? Your natural skepticism won't let you consider such a glorious possibility without at least a teensy sliver of actual evidence? Well, okay, Scully-- luckily for you, faithful viewer Darren Dewey stumbled upon an interesting page over at MacMall. If you check out their Mac "clearance" section, you'll find that every single Mac in Apple's product line is listed. What more proof do you need that Uncle Steve is preparing to disgorge a veritable plethora of Mac-flavored goodness? Oh, sure, we suppose that there's the slightest chance that the MacMall people haven't the remotest clue what the term "clearance" means, or perhaps they're using a slightly lax definition of the word just to sell some of that excess inventory we've all been hearing so much about, but we figure Santa Steve's pulling out all the stops to make up for the disappointing quarter. He's just a jolly ol' feller, after all (when we isn't firing elves in the elevator).
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SceneLink (2757)
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 | | The above scene was taken from the 12/21/00 episode: December 21, 2000: Does 600 MHz sound dangerously fast to you? Don't worry; rumor has it that Apple may instead ship a safe and sane 533 MHz G4 instead. Meanwhile, MacMall's clearance page hints that Apple may be preparing to revamp all of its product lines, and somehow Drew Carey scored a Cube at work...
Other scenes from that episode: 2756: Laugh? I Thought I'd Die (12/21/00) Are you one of those guys who was ranting wildly and foaming at the mouth about how unacceptable it is that Apple will only be at 600 MHz when the next Macworld Expo rolls around in a few weeks? If so, you might want to sit down, take a few deep breaths, and keep that prescription bottle within easy reach... 2758: Nerdy, Stocky, And Stylin' (12/21/00) Finally, a viable strategy for selling all those Cubes currently clotting the arteries of the retail channel like so much... artery-clogging stuff. Word on the street is that those rebates aren't working nearly as well as Apple had hoped, and so evidently the company has fallen back on Plan B: product placement on highly-rated TV shows...
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