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The Next Probable Casualty (5/9/01)
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Speaking of companies that are shutting down, few bottom-feeding cheapo Wintel builders raised as many hackles in the Mac community as eMachines. Though you may have repressed the memory, these were the folks who not only first sought to revolutionize the industry by selling dirt-cheap beige boxes to people who couldn't afford a computer any less ugly, but also went on to sully the iMac's reputation by selling their yucky "eOne" copycat in hopes of freeloading off of Apple's industrial design and marketing budgets. And indeed, the company boasts the number three spot in the retail desktop market. Or, at least, it used to, back in June of '99; you'd think the corporate web site would have newer data than that, but hey, give eMachines a break-- it's beleaguered.
Yes, it appears that selling fully-functional (well, as fully-functional as Wintels get, anyway) computers for approximately $59.95 each wasn't the world's brightest business plan. With margins as razor-thin as eMachines's must have been, a slight dip in the economy is all it takes to throw the train off the rails. A couple of months ago the company announced that it was slashing its staff by 16%, and other plans to raise some actual profit (such as revenue from ads that customers would see when connecting to the 'net) have fallen by the wayside. eMachines sales figures were down almost 50% at the end of 2000 and things are looking grim. Small wonder, then, that The Register reports that the company is shopping around for a buyer.
The big question, of course, is who would want to buy yet another beige box maker, especially one that's evidently hovering just this side of The Way Of All Microns? The eOne was pretty much the only noteworthy (if breathtakingly ugly and evil) thing ever to come out of that company, and it's conspicuously absent from the eMachines product page; it doesn't even appear on the "previous models" page, implying strongly that Apple's lawyers not only managed to get eMachines from selling any more eOnes, but also succeeded in expunging the product from the very space-time continuum. Still, if you've got a hankering to run your own PC manufacturer even further into the ground, cash in your penny jar and make an offer; who knows what might happen?
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SceneLink (3042)
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And Now For A Word From Our Sponsors |
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 | | The above scene was taken from the 5/9/01 episode: May 9, 2001: Mac fans may be a teensy bit overexcited about this whole Apple retail store thing. Meanwhile, a Dell employee mostly concurs with our diagnosis of Michael Dell's psychosis, and el cheapo boxmaker eMachines is hurting and looking for a buyer...
Other scenes from that episode: 3040: Bordering On Obsession (5/9/01) If there were ever any doubt that the Mac-using community is off its collective nut, the world now knows for sure-- and not because of our oddball choice of computing platform, our quixotic battle against assimilation by the Windows horde, or even our unyielding willingness to bathe in Reality Distortion Field radiation like it's a cure for exposure to poor taste... 3041: Here's Your Second Opinion (5/9/01) We here at AtAT have occasionally been criticized for describing Michael Dell as mentally ill when we lack even a basic psychiatric education upon which to base that diagnosis; furthermore, the closest we've even gotten to the man is reading about his exploits in the press...
Or view the entire episode as originally broadcast... | |  |
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