Stalling Tactics Win Again (7/13/01)
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Do you suppose that Microsoft is devious enough to time its moves in the "Redmond Justice" saga so that the AtAT staff is too distracted with other issues to notice? After all, it's the week before Macworld Expo, we're overloaded with mail about G4 spy photos and LCD-less iMacs, we drove three hours out of state to cram the AtATmobile full of hundreds of t-shirts and cart them back to headquarters, we're still engineering a tricky switchover to a new bandwidth provider, and in the midst of all that, Microsoft decides that now is a good time to make noises about settling its antitrust case.

In fact, if weren't for faithful viewer Rod tipping us off to a CNNfn article on Wednesday, we probably would have missed it entirely, what with all the Expo-related hoo-ha flying around. (Plus, now that the Emmy nominations are out and Buffy didn't get a single nod, not even for "The Body," we're officially dead inside.) But if Microsoft was counting on us being too busy to tell you about its "willingness to settle," then Bill and friends figured wrong. We may be two days late, but we're moving fast.

Here's the skinny: Microsoft has announced that it is now willing to "allow PC makers licensing its operating system software the option to remove the 'Start-menu' entries and icon that provide end users with access to its Internet Explorer web browser." And even more startling is the company's newfound willingness to include IE in the "Add/Remove Programs" feature in this fall's Windows XP. Letting end users remove IE? If nothing else, that's a technological miracle, because as we all know from Microsoft's testimony on the stand, IE isn't an application, but an integral and inseparable component of Windows. We wonder if Bill can turn water into wine, too?

While we're not thrilled with the idea of Microsoft finally settling this case instead of going down with guns a-blazin', we'll be interested to hear what the current administration deems to be an acceptable resolution as settlement talks begin anew. In the meantime, since Microsoft is also allowing manufacturers to add icons to the Windows XP desktop, over three years after this saga began, PC manufacturers will finally be able to ship Windows systems sans IE and with another browser installed in its place. "Hey, Netscape, great news! Uh, Netscape? Netscape?..."

 
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From the writer/creator of AtAT, a Pandemic Dad Joke taken WAYYYYYY too far

 

The above scene was taken from the 7/13/01 episode:

July 13, 2001: Further evidence arises hinting at CRT-based iMacs next week, but Apple has a grand scheme to make sure those babies sell like hotcakes. Meanwhile, Dell refutes recent research showing Apple to have regained the lead in education sales, and after three years, Microsoft finally allows the removal of Internet Explorer from Windows -- now that it no longer makes a difference, of course...

Other scenes from that episode:

  • 3175: Foolproof iMac Plan #112 (7/13/01)   Man, make the suggestion that next week's iMac probably won't feature an LCD display, and suddenly people treat you like you kick blind puppies for fun and profit. As an extra bonus, you also get to hear every synonym for "liar" found in Roget's Thesaurus-- plus a fine collection of epithets slightly too "alternative" for that staid publication...

  • 3176: "You're Wrong! Probably." (7/13/01)   This probably won't come as any particular surprise to anyone, but you remember that scene a few days ago about how one research firm has determined that Apple has overtaken Dell in educational sales to reclaim the crown? Well, prepare yourself for a shock: Dell is denying the truth of that claim...

Or view the entire episode as originally broadcast...

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