Raise Hopes At Own Risk (1/11/02)
SceneLink
 

Faithful viewer Jack (presumably some other non-AtAT-affiliated Jack, or else we're in serious trouble) wrote in wanting to know "where all the G5 rumors got to." Well, Jack, while we'd suggest that anyone who honestly expected Apple to unveil Power Mac G5s running at 2.4 GHz last Monday should maybe look into getting their skepticism tanks refilled, semi-credible G5 rumors are still alive and well. Personally, based largely on the fact that Motorola's constant job cuts implies that the entire company now consists of about twelve employees (at least four of whom were formerly janitorial staff and not well-versed in the finer points of semiconductor design), we're not really expecting G5s until maybe this summer at the earliest. Assuming Motorola can keep its book of pink slips sheathed for a while, that is.

But that's just us being our usual skeptical selves, and we'd be remiss to mention that lots of people are expecting Power Mac G5 systems much, much sooner than that. In fact, plenty of Mac fans are breathlessly awaiting what they consider to be a dead certain G5 unveiling next month at Seybold on the 19th, or maybe at the Macworld Expo in Tokyo on March 21st at the latest. Those who choose to expect G5s sooner rather than later have all manner of rumorlicious tidbits at their disposal to fan the flames of their optimism-- there was, for example, the way that the G5 was mentioned multiple times in the web pages of a shareware scanner application called VueScan last month.

However, if you need evidence a little more "established" than a mention by a shareware author to plunge you headlong into giddy hopes of imminent G5itude, you're in luck; faithful viewer The Mod Imposter found something a little stronger. It seems that the G5 just made an appearance on one of the web pages at the Epson Sweden site. Somebody took a screenshot just in case the page disappears; you might have to squint a little to see it, but if you focus, you'll be able to pick out the phrase "Apple G3/G4/G5/Cube" in what is apparently a compatibility statement for its new line of laser printers. Sure, it's in Swedish, but "G5" spells "speed" in any language, baby.

So there's the latest G5 sighting, and admittedly it's a little thin, but hey, Epson's a big-name manufacturer, so surely a mention of the G5 over there ought to count for something. While we've chosen to follow the path of least disappointment, please don't let us put a damper on your plans for chirpy optimism and ebullience; we just decided that it might be nice to be pleasantly surprised for a change.

 
SceneLink (3501)
And Now For A Word From Our Sponsors
 

Mash-ups and original music by AtAT's former Intern and Goddess-in-Training

Prim M at YouTube
 

The above scene was taken from the 1/11/02 episode:

January 11, 2002: The gloves are off, and Apple looks ready to tackle Microsoft head-on in its new marketing push. Meanwhile, Epson Sweden lets slip a little mention of the G5, and the Expo gets invaded by "porn clowns" looking for jobs...

Other scenes from that episode:

  • 3500: Finally Telling It Like It Is (1/11/02)   Is it just us, or is Apple getting a little... bolder about taking on Microsoft in public these days? Way back in '97, Steve Jobs stood up in front of a Macworld Expo audience and declared the OS wars were over, announced that Microsoft and Apple were now bestest buddies, and then introduced Bill Gates's Big Giant Head live via satellite to tell the mostly-horrified crowd that Microsoft had just purchased $150 million of non-voting AAPL stock and assured us all that everything would be just fine...

  • 3502: The Jeers Of A Klown (1/11/02)   Finally, what better way to draw the curtain down on a hectic Expo week and kick off the weekend than with baffling tales of obscenity-muttering, corset-wearing Killer iKlowns from Outer Moscone? Faithful viewer j.e. gibson kindly forwarded us a Salon article that details what happens when dotcom casualties have too much time-- and makeup-- on their hands: basically, they band together, dress up like clowns, and try to get into Macworld Expo armed with helium balloons and megaphones, with the intention of harassing showgoers in hopes of being given jobs...

Or view the entire episode as originally broadcast...

Vote Early, Vote Often!
Why did you tune in to this '90s relic of a soap opera?
Nostalgia is the next best thing to feeling alive
My name is Rip Van Winkle and I just woke up; what did I miss?
I'm trying to pretend the last 20 years never happened
I mean, if it worked for Friends, why not?
I came here looking for a receptacle in which to place the cremated remains of my deceased Java applets (think about it)

(1287 votes)
Apple store at Amazon

As an Amazon Associate, AtAT earns from qualifying purchases

DISCLAIMER: AtAT was not a news site any more than Inside Edition was a "real" news show. We made Dawson's Creek look like 60 Minutes. We engaged in rampant guesswork, wild speculation, and pure fabrication for the entertainment of our viewers. Sure, everything here was "inspired by actual events," but so was Amityville II: The Possession. So lighten up.

Site best viewed with a sense of humor. AtAT is not responsible for lost or stolen articles. Keep hands inside car at all times. The drinking of beverages while watching AtAT is strongly discouraged; AtAT is not responsible for damage, discomfort, or staining caused by spit-takes or "nosers."

Everything you see here that isn't attributed to other parties is copyright ©,1997-2024 J. Miller and may not be reproduced or rebroadcast without his explicit consent (or possibly the express written consent of Major League Baseball, but we doubt it).