We'll sign off with a quickie today, because we have to begin our elaborate preparations for tonight's new episode of Buffy (and it can take hours of intense meditation to attain the proper state of cosmic enlightenment). You probably remember that, a couple of weeks ago, CNET started profiling the "top chief executives in high technology" in something they dubbed the "Vision Series." At the time, we harped on the heinous injustice that a fearless leader as innovative and forward-looking as His Steveness could somehow have been omitted from such a list.

Well, we've since heard from many AtAT viewers who complained to CNET that Uncle Steve was definitely considered for the series, but he declined to be interviewed, hence his conspicuous absence from his rightful spot among the giants of the industry-- so sayeth CNET, anyway. However, faithful viewer T.S. McBride informs us that today we've got the next best thing: yes, it's Mike Dell Day over at the Vision Series headquarters. And about the only thing funnier than the holding-cell charm of ol' Mike's mug shot is the way that CNET practically bastes him in praise for-- get this-- doing "nothing at all."

Yes, folks, today CNET honors Mike Dell because he "did not join the rush to make handheld devices," and he did not "open stores" (actually, he did, for a while, didn't he?). Moreover, his pathetic attempt at a "stylishly designed PC" failed miserably and was axed after six months on the market, which was evidently a masterstroke of strategy in CNET's opinion. In other words, he's a visionary because he really just doesn't do anything but buy cheap components in absurdly high volumes, slap them together, and starve the competition by driving margins through the floor. Forget about excellent (or, indeed, any) industrial design, shaping the functional destiny of the personal computer, or any of that crap-- it's all about sledgehammer-tactic price wars. Now that's vision, baby! (But heck, even we admit that it works.)

To their credit, the folks at CNET only gave Mike a B+ for vision on his report card, with an A for leadership and an A- for execution. We suppose that's all fairly reasonable. At first we had to wonder about the A for "star power," since, as far as we've been able to tell, the man is about as charismatic as a block of wood with a pair of dots drawn on it for eyes, but we got to thinking... you can't be obsessed with Steve Jobs for four years without at least a little of the guy's showmanship rubbing off on you, right?