Okay, we've spent the last twenty-four hours breathing into a paper bag and visualizing the color green, and we think we've finally got that whole hyperventilation thing under control. We actually consider ourselves lucky that the implications of Apple's new "Brilliant savings" Power Mac promo only triggered respiratory issues. Since word of the promo first got out over the weekend, we've gotten reports from stricken Mac fans around the globe who, when faced with the possibility of no new G5s until the end of June, came down with one or more of the following stress-induced symptoms: hives; dry mouth; swollen extremities; uncontrollable trembling; sudden baldness; intermittent lack of bladder control; unexplained massive blood loss; and psychosomatic leprosy. Clearly we got off light.

Things actually got a little worse for a while, when we noticed that Apple had reset the clock on the "More memory for less" promotion, which, you may recall, offers discounted RAM on (among other things) Power Mac G5s. It was originally slated to expire on March 27th, and formed a cornerstone of the whole "new G5s at the end of March" theory. The promo now runs through June 26th just like "Brilliant savings" does, and yes, that little surprise had us wheezing extra hard for a while. But we've got it under control, now. It's all good.

We'd like to extend a special thank-you to AppleInsider for assisting in our recovery by giving us a slim thread of hope to cling to: the site's sources claim that the "Brilliant savings" promo "should not be taken as an indication that new Power Mac and display models will be delayed" until WWDC. The reasoning is that the promo's fine print specifies the qualifying display by part number (M8537ZM/A), so even if new displays ship tomorrow, the $500 rebate would only apply to purchases of the older model. Furthermore, the promo merely states that "all Apple Power Mac G5 computers" are qualifying products; not a part number to be found. So if new Power Macs ship tomorrow, too (yeah, right), they'll qualify just fine if customers buy them together with the existing Cinema HD display that Apple is pushing so hard to get rid of. In other words, the promo isn't about clearing G5 inventory; it's "intended to get rid of the current model 23 inch Cinema HD Displays for $500 off, regardless of new product introductions."

The same sort of logic applies to the terms of "More memory for less," as well, which specifies that "only DDR333 or DDR400 RAM modules qualify"; the revised Power Macs we've all been waiting for since the Cretaceous Period are rumored to use "updated and possibly ECC RAM," thus disqualifying them from the price break. So, we feel better-- even though all the "fine print" logic strikes us as a little thin. But heck, we're Mac fans; we're used to hanging our hopes and dreams on a lot less evidence than that.

For example, speaking of fine print, eagle-eyed faithful viewer Danny was first to spot this little nugget buried in the legalese of "Brilliant savings": "This offer may be combined with the Apple Impress for Less rebate." Now, maybe we were asleep at the switch, but we don't recall any "Impress for Less" promo, and if there ever was one, it's not there now (although we suppose it might be by the time you see this). So Apple has another new promo waiting in the wings, eh? How very... interesting. Because clearly it's proof positive of an imminent hardware introduction. G5s ahoy!

See what we mean about the "hopes and dreams" thing? Yeah. It's a sickness. But hey, it beats psychosomatic leprosy. Ewwww.