There are mere hours left until Steve takes the stage-- and can't you just smell the Kool-Aid? Over the weekend, rumoric energy readings sampled from key locations around the globe officially reached what professional speculationologists technically classify as a "fever pitch." And most of the buzz is about the iPod, which may gall some Mac purists (this is Macworld, after all), but heck, why be bitter? We figure, just revel in the craziness and take whatever comes bearing an Apple logo.

So howzabout a last-minute roundup of the most intriguing iPod rumors floating around out there just prior to the show? Probably the one that came from furthest out in left field is the one that faithful viewer terry dunham forwarded us, a scoop which didn't come from Think Secret or AppleInsider or any other Mac-oriented dirt-dishing site, but instead from a national TV show about celebrities and their associated clothes, diets, and divorces. Yes, according to a MacInTouch reader, Lindsay Lohan's little sister Aliana appeared on Saturday's episode of Access Hollywood, claiming to have recently finished shooting a commercial for the "iPod radio," which will be released "this week." D'oh! Apparently someone didn't understand all the big words in her NDA. And what's Steve gonna do, rough up a ten-year-old girl? Now there's a photo op for the ages.

Now, not being Access Hollywood junkies, we can't actually confirm that the Aliana "Motormouth" Lohan thing even really happened. But as faithful viewer Richard Plotkin points out, Mac OS Rumors) claims to have received over 100 messages in a fifteen-minute period from breathless celeb-trash viewers who witnessed the spot-- except that MOSR says that it was Lindsay Lohan herself who claimed to have done an iPod radio TV commercial, not her sister Aliana. Whatever. The point is, apparently somebody with the surname "Lohan" shot a commercial for an imminent Apple product called the "iPod radio," and her age and bust size are totally irrelevant in the context of just what the heck the iPod radio might be in the first place. Is it a flash-based iPod with an FM radio receiver built in? Can it transmit to a car radio without the need of a separate FM transmitter such as the iTrip? Does Howard Stern keep talking over all of your music when you try to play it? What?

But before you go all nutzoid over the "iPod radio" concept, you might want to rein it in a little, there, because according to faithful viewer neopod, MacityNet.it claims to have the real scoop on the new iPod-- based on banners they witnessed being set up at the Moscone Center for the Big Show. Apparently someone got a little lax with security, because MacityNet has posted what appear at a quick glance to be legitimate photos of a man in a really bad shirt hanging a big, green banner that says "Life is random." In addition, the site claims to have taken photos of several other banners inside, which touted "240 songs" (which would be 1 GB of storage) and depicted a smaller white iPod "with a shape more vertical" than existing models, and-- remember this rumor?-- no screen.

Unfortunately, MacityNet claims that the staff forced them to delete all the photos of the banners they'd taken inside, so we only have their word to go on. But the "life is random" thing freaks us out a little; could Apple really be on the verge of shipping a 240-song iPod with no screen-- and no navigation except "PREV" and "NEXT"? Oh, and maybe a radio receiver? We guess we'll know soon enough; unfortunately, for true Apple freaks, "soon enough" just isn't soon enough. Hang in there, folks-- bite down on your wallet so you don't swallow your tongue, and try to relax, because soon all will be revealed...