(Welcome to the World of Endless Reruns! A quarter of a century ago, As the Apple Turns (AtAT) was a daily web-based soap opera obsessively following the melodramatic ins and outs of all things Apple. Now the archives are broadcasting in syndication, so each day you can see what life was like 25 years ago when Apple was still the underdog, all in not-so-fabulous RetroVision™!)

TV-PGDecember 21, 1999: AirPort starts reeling in some more charitable reviews-- from the Wintel camp. Meanwhile, astronauts on the space shuttle Discovery find that even in a vacuum, Windows still sucks, and MacWarehouse may be in jeopardy following a buyout by an investor group led by ex-IBM exec Jerry York...
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It's Payback Time! (12/21/99)
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Looks like the spirit of the season is making its mark on AirPort reviews. Just a couple of days ago we awarded AirPort the coveted "Most Maligned Apple Product of 1999" award, based on product reviews likening the Base Station setup process to trying to pry out one's own larynx with a shrimp fork. MacFixit originally recommended readers not to buy AirPort equipment, due to the trouble they had getting the gear to work. Suddenly, though, the tables seemed to have turned. The Wintel-oriented ZDNet AnchorDesk just posted their own take on Apple's long-awaited wireless networking equipment, and the review is a distinct thumbs-up.

Oh, sure, you have to get past the overt anti-Apple sentiment embedded in the article's very title: "Surprise: Apple Makes Wireless Networking Great." (Some of us aren't exactly surprised, buddy.) But once you do, you'll find that editorial director Jim Louderback has all kinds of wonderful things to say about AirPort. If Apple's looking for excerpts to slap on the AirPort's box, here are a few of the more glowing phrases: "well worth the wait"; "installation was simple"; "the performance and connectivity was great"; and "it's fantastic." Okay, so the phrases aren't exactly colorful; we mentioned these are Wintel folks, right?

Here's where the delicious irony kicks in: the "only beef" Louderback had with the AirPort was that "Apple only sells Mac-enabled versions." Yup, you heard us right-- these are Wintel folks complaining about a Mac-only product. Oooo, payback is sweet, isn't it? Not that the author doesn't have a valid point; Apple probably could crank out an external USB AirPort module for non-AirPort-ready Macs and PCs with a free USB port. But considering the trouble some people have had getting AirPort working properly for their Macs, we hope Apple holds off on making additional equipment until the current stuff's working a little more smoothly.

 
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Cosmic Suckiness (12/21/99)
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Houston, we have a problem. Let's say you're an astronaut risking your life in outer space. You're brave enough to trust that your craft won't burst into flames and that your ground control crew can get you through any potential tight squeezes. But would you feel comfortable knowing that your safety and welfare is relying on Windows? We thought not...

Yes, according to a Reuters article kindly pointed out by faithful viewer Jerry O'Neil, apparently it's not enough that the Discovery crew is risking life and limb to repair the Hubble telescope-- NASA's also making them deal with Windows and its attendant bugs. Apparently the shuttle crew is able to receive email sent by NASA, which is used to "transmit some vital information" as well as to send hometown news to help ward off homesickness. But all was not well when the crew tried to retrieve their email a couple of days ago: "It's just coming out as x's and o's," reported astronaut John Grunsfeld. Luckily, that particular message was just a hometown news update, and not some of that afforementioned "vital information." The actual important data did get through-- though the crew had trouble getting it to print.

The article doesn't go into detail about what the crew had to do to get their email and printer working properly again, noting only that "Grunsfeld struggled with the Windows-based application and a balky printer for much of the morning." Shadowy and incredibly unreliable AtAT sources assure us that Grunsfeld spent over forty-five minutes on hold after calling the printer manufacturer's tech-support line-- and long distance charges from space are murder. So much for your tax dollars going to good use. All we can say is this: if NASA ever starts sending incredibly sedentary and out-of-shape television producers into space, we're not going until they let us use Macs. The last thing we need is to be missing the majestic beauty of seeing the earth from space because we're fiddling with IRQs after Windows plug-and-pray futzes with a registry setting.

 
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Lady In Danger (12/21/99)
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All is not well in MacWarehouse-ville... Looks like its parent company, Micro Warehouse Inc., has just sold out to an investor group for $725 million. Worrisome fact #1: that investor group is being led by a "former IBM executive." Worrisome fact #2: "In recent years, [Micro Warehouse] has struggled with... falling sales for its core Apple Computer Inc. product lines." Is this the end of MacWarehouse? Thanks to faithful viewer Adam J. Bezark for pointing out the Reuters story and giving us something new to worry about.

But wait! That's not just any ex-IBM exec-- that's Jerry York! Jerry, as you may or may not know, is a member of Apple's Board of Directors. So perhaps the future of MacWarehouse is safe after all, as surmised by the Mac Observer. On the other hand, don't get too comfortable about MacWarehouse's continued existence; after all, remember when Intuit canned Quicken for the Mac? Guess who else was on Apple's Board? Uh-huh, Intuit CEO Bill Campbell. So anything's possible. (Then again, after the Quicken debacle, Steve Jobs managed to get a reversal-- maybe he can lean on York, too.)

Now, to be honest, we haven't bought anything from MacWarehouse in years. You really have to wonder how MacWarehouse gets away with charging twice as much for RAM as everyone else on the planet. We also find it annoying that we get a new frickin' catalog in the mail every three hours-- even Victoria's Secret isn't that prolific. But here's what we'd miss if MacWarehouse ever did go away: that same lady on the cover. We swear, we found an old Mac magazine from 1985 and the same picture was in the MacWarehouse ad! She never ages. She is the one constant in the Mac world, and as such, must be preserved at all costs. Don't let us down, Jerry...

 
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Previously, on As the Apple Turns...

TV-PGDecember 20, 1999: We interrupt this program for a special bulletin-- Apple is no longer beleaguered. (In other breaking news, Hawaii was declared the 50th state in the union.) Meanwhile, rumors of Pismo's light-up keyboard has the AtAT staff all a-flutter, and Bill "Scrooge" Gates angers Santa with Windows 2000's hefty RAM requirements...

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