You know, maybe it's just us, but from our perspective, 2002 has been a real stinkin' dud as far as retail excitement is concerned. Last year, you may recall, was a veritable whirlwind of frantic store openings and the accompanying gala celebratory events; Apple managed to chew through twenty-seven grand openings, and the whole dizzying thrill ride didn't even start until May. In stark contrast, 2002 is now more than half over, and we've seen, what, four new stores in the past six months? And when those few new locations did open their doors to the public, we're told that the ensuing hoopla was of a significantly more muted quality than the debauched and drunken orgies of retail bliss that marked the first round of openings last year. Okay, sure, maybe consumer confidence isn't exactly bubbly with enthusiasm just now, but economy shmeconomy-- that's no reason to deprive us poor Mac fans of our insatiable need to line up outside of a mall at ridiculous hours. (We tried camping outside of an Eddie Bauer four hours before opening, in a desperate attempt to fill the emotional void. It just wasn't the same.)

Just as we were about to despair, however, hope flared anew. As we mentioned recently, Apple finally added a new imminent grand opening to the perennially vacant "Coming Soon" section of its retail page last week; the long-awaited SoHo store will finally go live on Thursday, the day after next week's Stevenote. And between the sheer size and grandeur of the SoHo location (it's Apple's "first flagship retail store"), the sweepstakes in which Apple is giving away a "Digital Lifestyle Collection" worth thousands, and the fact that Manhattan will be largely overrun with a throng of RDF-infused international Mac freaks all looking for a good time, well, we figure this particular hoedown is going to be a rowdy return to the Apple grand openings of yesteryear. Sadly, we'll be corporeally absent, but we'll be there in spirit, overturning burning cars with the rest of you maniacs.

But guess what? SoHo's not the only new store rushing down the pike. Faithful viewer Justin Feldman tipped us off to a Newsday article which reports that Apple also plans to open a new retail store on Long Island, at the Roosevelt Field Mall in Garden City-- just two days after the Manhattan shindig. While at broadcast time the Long Island location still hadn't made the "Coming Soon" list at Apple's site, faithful viewer John W. acted on a hunch and discovered this nifty Apple Store Roosevelt Field web page all ready to go, needing only links to make it come alive. If you're still in the New York area the day after the Expo closes down and you're not too partied out from rockin' SoHo Mac-style, consider dragging your fun-loving carcass out to Long Island for Round 2 of the new era of retail festivities. After all, you can never get enough.

Those of you who think the fun is limited strictly to the Empire State, think again; faithful viewer afterfxguru noticed a slew of new postings on Apple's Retail Job Opportunities page, hinting at upcoming Apple stores in such previously unblessed locales as Des Peres, MO; Emeryville, CA; Las Vegas, NV; Oakbrook, IL; Indianapolis, IN; King of Prussia, PA; and Troy, MI. So even if a road trip to New York isn't in the cards, sit tight and maybe an Apple retail throwdown will bring the party to a swanky mall near you.

Speaking of mall presences, we'd be remiss if we neglected to mention Mike Dell's latest bout of Steve-flavored obsession: apparently ol' Mikey came to the conclusion that he just gotsta have him a retail presence, because faithful viewer FlowFlow notes that CNET is reporting on the sudden sprouting of Dell kiosks in several Texas shopping centers this week. (Not stores-- kiosks.) The kiosks won't stock actual merchandise, but will let mallwalkers test-drive some Dell gear and then order it for home delivery. (Because that approach worked so well for Gateway.) Anyway, it sounds like before long we might be able to leave the plush retail environment of the Apple store and immediately stroll through the mall right past the Dell kiosk-- located right between the Orange Julius stand and the cart with the guy selling "Ask Me What's In My Pants" t-shirts. Classy!