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The Amazing $40 iBook (10/11/02)
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Since real news is still somewhat scarce around here these days, we thought we'd take a moment and expand upon our previous hints on how to score a free iPod; today's Super Penny-Pincher Thrifty Tip widens the scope a little, and instead of telling you how to cram one or more thousand songs in your pocket without spending a dime, it will reveal to you how you can get your hands on an iBook for just forty bucks. That's right: forty smackers, and you can own Apple's best-selling consumer portable to do with as you please. Heck, for forty clams, use it as a doorstop if you like-- it's still almost a good deal.
Ready for this? Okay, pay close attention, here: faithful viewer Jens Kueter drew our attention to a Kennebec Journal puff piece which details one seventh grade class's early successes and glitches with iBooks as provided by the state under that much-ballyhooed (and much-opposed, but ultimately approved) State of Maine middle school laptop program. (Fun fact: according to the article, Maine's contract for the iBooks is not with Apple, but with some company called "Macintosh." Who knew?) The salient bit, here, is that Maine's Department of Education director of special projects Yellow Light Breen-- don't ask-- reveals that the iBooks were not bought outright, but rather acquired under the terms of a "kind of a lease-purchase deal." And here's the kicker: says Breen, "at the end of the four years we'll have an opportunity to buy them for $40 each."
So there you have it, folks: how to get a $40 iBook. First negotiate a $37.2 million contract with Apple (sorry-- "Macintosh") to provide some 38,000 iBooks to every middle school child and teacher in your state. (State of Mainers: since it's already been done, you may have to move before you can complete Step 1. Perhaps Montana?) Next, fork over the cash and wait four years while your state's students enjoy their government-supplied Macs. Once that's over with, all you need to do is pay another $40 for each iBook you want to keep, scrape the gum off the screens, and enjoy. What could be simpler?
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And Now For A Word From Our Sponsors |
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 | | The above scene was taken from the 10/11/02 episode: October 11, 2002: Apple unleashes more promos than you can comfortably fit in your pants. Meanwhile, PC Magazine has evidently been assimilated into Apple's alien clone pod people program, and for the first time anywhere, we reveal the secret to buying a $40 iBook...
Other scenes from that episode: 3774: Yeah, Promo THIS, Buddy (10/11/02) Well, here we were, all set for a juicy true tale of Mac weirdness to end this latest news lull. After all, we had certainly primed the pump, entreating Cupertino-area AtAT fans to don rainbow wigs and offer Steve Jobs a stick of gum as he attempted to gain entry to his car; heck, we figured probably at least three or four people might have taken us up on it, and we'd have the added luxury of being able to tell you about a whole stinkin' mob of rainbow-wigged, gum-waving psychos descending upon poor Steve and giving him Dali-esque nightmares for the rest of his natural life... 3775: "One Of Us! One of Us!" (10/11/02) It's one of the worst-kept secrets in the Mac universe: Apple is silently killing off various anti-Mac pundits and replacing them with far more receptive pod people that are otherwise indistinguishable from the real deal...
Or view the entire episode as originally broadcast... | |  |
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